Friday, April 9, 2010

Aliens and Obligations

Ever seen Alien, when the little monster comes exploding out of Ripley's stomach?

Feels like thats going to happen, only out of my head.

Other than a crazy headache, I'm doing pretty well.

Tendonitis is all but gone. Gonna try and put a good ride and run in this weekend.

Not going to lie, during those few weeks where my training was dramatically reduced, I had legit questions about my commitment to the sport, and this one was the most prevalent:
"Is this worth the emotional peaks and valleys?"

I am SO HIGH when I am training well, but the lows are really, really terrible when things aren't going according to plan.

I continued to question myself for days and days, until I came to the realization that there can be no other way.

Its who I am.
I have a body and mind built for unending activity. I live for it. I don't just WANT to do this, I HAVE to, or else I am an evil, vile person.
I almost feel obligated. If I quit now, I am wasting what I was created for.

I will throw myself off a bridge before I live a mundane life of: wake up, go to work, come home, eat, go to bed, repeat. That works for some people.

I need more.
I need to feel alive, and that life comes from physical experiences that turn me inside out emotionally.

When I've cycled or swam or run ALL DAY(or more), I feel like I have used every second to its potential....and that makes me happy and satisfied with my life, and who I am as a person.

Bring me to life.

krp

No comments:

Post a Comment