The Path Less Taken

To Run

2012-01-15T10:30:00.000-08:00

To run is to flip the middle finger to the world.

The trend is fat and sloppy.
The norm is to work yourself to the bones and buy the next new thing.
The next new thing will always be "EASIER, BIGGER, BETTER!"
The next new thing will always yield the same or worse result.

Society wants to make you lethargic about life and stressed about obligations you've created just to fit in with them.

To run is to be free of it all.
They can't catch you out there. They're too weighed down by it all.
They hate that you have your own mental space. They can't touch it or take it, or find their own, and it makes them crazy.
They call you a "fanatic" because you have a passion outside of their cubicle world.

You have seen a place where all that exists is movement and food and water- and this is all that matters... all that should matter.

To run is to simplify.
To run is to live.

"The thing I treasure most in life cannot be taken away
There will never be a reason why I will surrender to your advice
To change myself, I'd rather die
Though they will not understand
I will make the greatest sacrifice
You can't predict where the outcome lies
You'll never take me alive
I'm alive"
-Disturbed

Shoe Review: Skechers Go Run

2011-12-16T06:06:00.000-08:00

As many of you know, I recently started a job at an outdoor outfitter. And while I peddle gear, I am not a "gear guy". I don't like having tons of stuff. I don't get excited about new technology. I commute 30 miles each way every day on a 1993 Trek 1100, with a plastic messenger bag I got for free at a convention 7 years ago. The zipper is broken, so I use a trash bag on rainy days. Just some background.

On my first day, I met Nate Sanel, an ultrarunner and motorcycle shop owner. We chatted a little bit about running and shoes.
He brought up his ties to Skechers, and I stared blankly at him, totally unaware that the company had even considered breaking into the running industry.

Nate was adamant that these things were the real deal. To be honest I was skeptical, given Skecher's history of such inventions as the Shape-Ups "toning" shoe. He mentioned that they had sent him a test pair of a design called the Go Run that was a tad big for him...and that size just happened to be mine.

A couple weeks later, Nate dropped the shoes off for me. I immediately tried them on, interested to try a pair of shoes that hadn't hit the market yet, and curious about the rocker design.

First thing I noticed was an uncomfortable lump in the middle of my foot. Second thing I noticed was how unbelievably light they were. I spent the last few hours at work analyzing just what in the heck the purpose of the lump was.

On my first run, I figured it out. The Go Runs are not meant for standing around at work. They are meant for running. That lump is nonexistent while running, as the shoe's design forces you into a more efficient running style- not just landing mid to forefoot, but landing under the hips.
I am a midfoot striker already, but what I found is that while wearing this shoe, my turnover increased. As you may or may not know, fast leg-speed is much more efficient and leads to faster speed overall.

I generally do not wear socks while running, so I also found the the super-soft upper material to be a plus.

There is very little structure in the mid-sole, other than the lump I referred to. The rest is soft foam, and the shoe has no torsional rigidity to speak of. Think old-school Nike Waffles.

Bottom Line: I believe in the biomechanics of the foot and the body, but am skeptical of most minimalist shoes. However, the Skechers Go Run is a shoe I can hop on board with... at this time for shorter distances of marathon and under. Runners accustomed to the minimalist experience would be able to go long in this shoe. I would recommend using them in speed workouts and tempo runs, and gradually working them into longer runs.

Resolution Proposal for the Original Gangstas of Fitness

2011-12-12T09:37:00.000-08:00

We're merely weeks away from 2012.

January 1.
New Years.

Soon, the gym you know will not be the same.
You'll enter at the normal hour, and the treadmill you always use at that time will be occupied.

Flustered, you look over towards the stationary bike you sometimes use, and are frustrated to find that again, someone has dominated your usual machinery.

Glancing around the gym, the scene is the same: sweaty people fumbling with buttons on the cardio machines, constantly adjusting equipment, eyes darting around self-consciously.

Ah, yes. Resolution Season is almost here.
And this is where I throw you off.

I've been participating in endurance sports all of my life. I cannot help but notice that the further I continue on this journey of fitness, the more jaded I become. I think this happens to anyone who experiences too much in one particular area.
Been there, done that, becomes the attitude.

Most Original Gangstas in the fitness community can't help but look at the Posers with disdain and disgust.
It's not because of their weight or their appearance, it's just drastic perspective difference. People that LIVE the fitness lifestyle look forward to and enjoy their training. Resolutioners look at their workouts like a chore, and value their workout about as much as they value cleaning their toilet. This is why they last until about.... mid February at best. As long as the thought of a workout as misery prevails, fitness will not.

Maybe it's time for a change of perspective for the OGs in the fitness world. It's so easy to be a prick, sitting there glaring at the people struggling to bench a bar with no weight on it.

Instead of counting down the hours and minutes until another Resolution dream is crushed, why not look at the influx of new people in the gym as a chance to create new recruits to the army of the fit?
I think most give up because they have no idea what they are doing. Ignorance is not bliss in the gym.
Why not give some tips? Exchange email addresses if the encounter is good, and hold them accountable.

I'm not saying make a new workout partner, but shooting them an email asking how their workouts are going once in a while is enough to keep some people going...maybe enough even to get over that mid-February hump.
One winter, I did something like this, and started a running group for beginners. Some of these people are now very good friends of mine.
To see some of them now running ultras and becoming serious athletes is more rewarding than my own accomplishments.

We OGs have this foundation of knowledge from years and years of living and breathing and dreaming fitness. Why continue on this odyssey by selfishly withholding information that might otherwise make something click in someone?
Of course, motivation cannot be coached, and some people just don't want it bad enough.
However, some do. They just don't know where to start.
That's where we come in.

Happy Holidays.
Thanks for reading,

kalerp

Multi-Day Racing, Detriment?

2011-12-09T05:31:00.000-08:00

I'm still waiting on the word from Jorge down in Mexico as to whether there will be a Deca next year.

My 2012 race plans kind of hinge on that. He says it's very difficult to talk to the government about using the Parques Des Heroes, and the wheels turn slow.

I'm kind of caught in this mind-bending scenario where I want everything.
It was easy when the only thing I wanted in life was to race.

Now that I am living civilized and paying rent, all I want to do is STOP paying rent and start owning something... Racing stays at the forefront of my brain at all times, like a money-sucking leech.
The very real idea that I am going to have to do one or the other bugs the living piss out of me, and only adds to my manic training-working-no sleeping life.
Never can I dismiss my most expensive addiction. Is this sport a detriment to me? I think of the thousands of dollars of my own money that I've put into it over the last decade, and that's a down-payment on a house.

And then I think about the night I rode from Presque Isle to Bangor on a full moon, fully able to see Mt. Katahdin from route 2 in the shadows at 2 am.
Or the all night 50 mile run at the Relay for Life, when the miles came effortlessly.
Or the time Andy talked me into the winter version of the Death Race, and I chopped wood for 8 hours, then proceeded to carry it up a mountain in the snow....without snowshoes.
Or the blurriness of racing for 5 days straight, and how after crossing the finish line, everything in your life is so much clearer...even with a sleep-deprived mind.

Experiences like these cannot be photographed. They aren't tangible. My friends are all married with kids and dogs and houses and snowmobiles. I traded all of that for hardening experiences. I'm not sure whether this is good or bad. Who is to say?

All I know is that everyday I wake up and I'm surprised to find that during the night, a gigantic pansy has taken over my body like cancer.
So everyday, I put on my shoes and administer chemo.
Time for my daily treatment.

Quintuple Iron Finish

Quintuple Iron Race Report

The Commuter

2011-11-09T21:31:00.001-08:00

doubting the world
i exhale, in the dark

pedaling. pondering.
both require spinning

i turn down main street
storefront displays alight
empty sidewalks

stoplights blink
at no one
and oblige my right turn

a leaf crinkles
during a night breeze
a hum of rubber tires
dismissing untold miles

but the moon prevails
in silence.

krp

i run on

2011-10-27T08:13:00.001-07:00

brush past some prickles
blood seeps out my shin
branches with icicles
mud streaks on my chin

my thoughts are gone
so i run on

the only way to derail
from this crazy train
is to get on the trail
and stop my brain

my thoughts are gone
so i run on

my feet: scuffed and tired
keep going: the only choice
must use the inner fire
and ignore the quitter voice

my thoughts are gone
so i run on

Spectacles Off.

2011-10-22T18:44:00.000-07:00

I'm at odds with myself. Bear with me here.
Maybe reading this blog is entertainment for you, and if it is, that's great...but it is therapy for me.

While I'm open to some constructive criticism, I've been thinking about just tearing down the whole thing.

the blogs
www.kalepoland.com
the whole thing. everything.

In 2009, I met this absolutely great guy who had done the Double, and I met him while we were doing the Triple together. I needed help to do what I was doing. I scraped by to get to the Triple.
He gave me some advice, and one thing that still sticks out from Sam is:
"Hey you gotta toot your own horn- nobody's gonna toot it for you."
He had an awesome website, and got local news spots. He was very good at getting sponsorship dollars; basically full-boats to all of his races.

I wanted this, so I took this approach. Got a dot com. Made a Facebook page. The whole shebang.
I tried tooting my own horn, and then others tooted it for me, and for that, I will always be grateful.

But I think I'm done tooting. I never really loved the "look at me" approach, and it seems like the deeper this game gets, the more it's necessary. I have these ridiculous acquaintances on Facebook who are coming up in the sport. They are pictured in their sponsor's gear, showing off their calf muscles and looking glammed out. I call them Hollywooders.
Fuck that shit. That ain't me, and I'm done.

I don't want this to be "something I'm doing", I want this to be something I just do. It's a lifestyle, not a publicity stunt.
Maybe do a little fundraising on the side for those who need it.
If I have to work extra hours to get to the Deca, so be it.
It can be a satisfaction knowing I got there on my own two feet.

I'm tired of explaining it, and exhausted from talking myself up over and over again for minimal return.
I will vomit if I have to make another post about asking for money.

What I'd really like to do is shut the fuck up and train and race.

Just live the life quietly, not make a spectacle.

Thanks for reading,
krp

3x Iron, a Dysfunctional Family Reunion

2011-10-18T12:41:00.000-07:00

Friday, October 7th, 2011.
It is still dark at 6:45 am and under 50 degrees.
It seems as though the sun is not going to rise today.

The start of the Virginia Triple Iron, a 7.2 mile swim, 336 mile bike, and 78 mile run, is supposed to be in 15 minutes.
Steve Kirby, Race Director, herds shivering athletes, friends, and family to the shore of Lake Anna, where a dense fog still clings to the water. We are all grouped together for a photo, and for the magnitude of such a large event looming, there isn't one straight face there. This is just one reason I am standing in line with these other whackos: No Triathlon/Cycling Geek Attitude.
This event is simply too long to take seriously. The only thing you can do is keep a good attitude and adapt to the challenges of the weekend.

We get in the water, and I slap a high five with Jaime. To the lakeside spectator, Jaime and I were just amped to be starting, but he and I knew that we were both about to just work on surviving the morning. Last year at the Double Iron, we exited the water dead last, and were expecting to probably have the same result today.

I wasn't sure about him though, as I had heard him earlier, talking about actually training for the swim this year. As for myself, I knew it wasn't going to be pretty, having not swam a stroke since May (I had been living on a mountain for work). My goal was to flop around in the water like a wounded dolphin for about 6 hours, and then start the race.

Sure enough, one and a half hours after the second to last person had come out of the water, I emerged, laughing and apologetic for having my crew sit there by the lake for an entire morning. To put things in perspective, my buddy Andy(who had been training for an English Channel swim) had broken the swim course record that same morning, and was out of the water in 2 hours, 54 minutes.

The good news was that I had stayed on top of my nutrition for six hours, and was coming out of the water with a stomach that was not unsettled. Nicole, Tina, and I walked up to the bike course, and my parents and Amy helped get me ready to sit on the bike for a long, long time.

Knowing my swim was going to be absolutely awful, I planned to make a ton of time up on the bike. I wasn't planning on trying to win the race or anything, because I knew my mountain summer had cut into my training pretty hard. I just wanted to be done by early Sunday, so I wouldn't have to deal with the hot afternoon temperatures on the run.

Friday afternoon was spent just pedaling kind of mindlessly and catching up with guys like Joe Trettel and Sauerbrey, Chris Trimmer, and meeting the new athletes to the sport. The ultra triathlon community is pretty small, so we all know each other from one race or another. It really makes these races seem less like competition and more like family reunion. There are so few people who live this lifestyle, that it's always nice to either vent to an understanding peer about the financial side of the sport, or get a tip as to how they fit the training in around "normal" life. It is a unique bond we share, and it was an honor to meet people like Frank Fumich, who has done some serious adventuring around the world, and Kathy Roche-Wallace, who completed RAAM this year.

We all seemed to be pedaling at about the same rate for most of the ride...that is, except for the other half of Team Awesome, a name which I just made up a second ago.
My family(Mom, Dad, Amy), Tina, and Nicole were not just crewing for me. We had a prior arrangement to crew for Ghislain Marechal, from France/Belgium. He was absolutely wrecking the course, lapping everyone, and breaking the bike course record in the process. He would tell me after the race that his goal was to blow the race wide apart, and it worked.
He was going so fast, that everyone else thought they were going too slow. For many, it was their first Triple. Numerous athletes either dropped from the race or dropped down to the Double Iron as a result of him.

When night fell, most people stopped riding side by side, and began the tedium of clicking off mileage in the dark, in silence.
For some reason, I rarely remember the events of the nights spent cycling in these races. It was cold.
The toll of the ride was beginning to show, and highs and lows were rearing their heads. You might pass someone pedaling at 60 rpm, lights wobbling as they tried to stay awake in the late hours of the night and early hours of the morning.

At some point just before sunup, I was absolutely frozen, and on the downhill into the turnaround, I found myself nodding off. I elected to crawl into my sleeping bag and pass out for 20 minutes or so. At this point, Ghislain and Kamil were already off the bike and waging war on the run. Needless to say, I wasn't very happy about still having a significant chunk of mileage to do on the bike. Pretty sure I wasted a lot of energy on the swim just trying to get it done.

I got back on the bike, and stayed there, secretly hoping I would find a point of ignition like I always seem to during the last miles of the bike, and be done by noon. Generally my last miles are the quickest and happiest, but this would not be so today.
By 10am, I was pissed. The sun was coming up, and I had to ditch layers of clothing, which required stopping. This irked me even more. Somewhere around noon, I still had 50ish miles to go, and the Double Iron athletes were flooding the course. I had my second meltdown in 2 hours. So bothered by still being out there pedaling, I began ignoring my crew, because I knew if I opened my mouth, anything that came out would be evil and irrational. Instead, I did the self-destruction thing, and let Mr. Hyde take over. Whereas I was ignoring my crew and wasn't eating, I was becoming erratic. Every now and then I would just take off sprinting and swearing on my bike in a temper tantrum.

Off the bike around 4pm, I pledged to the crew that the run was NOT going to go like the bike. I was going to stay positive if it killed me. Nicole ran the first 14 miles with me, and then I grabbed my Ipod and plowed through a marathon. The first 45 miles of the run went by in a blink, and it was nice to run with Amy here and there. We all watched in amazement as Kamil finished his last lap and broke the course record, finishing the race in 39 hours, 55 minutes.

For a long time, it seemed like a lot of the Triple athletes weren't even on the course. Perhaps they were crashing during the coldest part of the night?
Somewhere around the 52 mile mark, I began the early morning stagger, and elected to take a short 20 minute nap before things got bad. Attitude was still great, and I wanted to keep it that way.

Daylight came, and with it, the Virginia heat that seems to cripple me every year there. With 20ish miles to go, the heat was in furnace mode, reflecting off the pavement. I hit the port-a-potty to bag balm my problem chaffing and umm...tend to business. Ghislain had been done for a while(2nd place!) and was hanging with the crew. He and my Dad got a bright idea.
I came out of the toilet to applause and cameras everywhere. Looking above, the finisher's banner had been placed over the toilet. Everyone laughed. It was a moment of levity that was certainly needed.

Another lap or two later, I had to put my feet up, as they were swelling like crazy. In an attempt to stay positive, I exclaimed,"After this, only 8 laps to go!" My dad misinterpreted what I said and agreed. After a lap, he realized an error and corrected me on the next lap. I still had 9 to go. In these races, this is an absolute detriment to your mental status.
I chugged a Red Bull, and Mr. Hyde came out for two fast laps. Slipknot blasted in my headphones, and I went to a very dark place in my head. Other athletes tried talking to me, and I couldn't do it. Just couldn't. The only thing out of my mouth would have been just awful. I NEEDED to bring the lap count to something that was manageable in my head before I could be social again. Those 4 miles were the fastest of the whole run, over 60 miles in.
Someday, I will find a way to keep Mr. Hyde on for a whole race. There has to be a way to harness that.

I spent the next 5 laps just walking. The heat was broiling, and there was zero shade. I resigned myself to the fact that I would be walking the last few laps, and that I might just as well enjoy it. Ghislain biked alongside me for a few laps, forcing me to dump freezing water on my head. We shot the shit and laughed, while I tried not to complain too much.
He peeled off to bike alongside the legend Guy Rossi, who was running in the Double, and finally there were two laps left.
Jake Holscher's crewman picked up where Ghislain stopped. We talked about his ultra running, and the possibility of him doing this one day.

Before I knew it, I was on the last lap. The last lap of these things are always kind of cool. It's a celebration of the events, highs, and lows of the weekend. All of the Double athletes were cheering as I passed them. I said goodbye to Adam at the run turnaround, who I met in '09 here at the Triple, and started the last mile of the 78 mile run. Down the last long gradual hill, and across the shadeless false flat, I looked down to the finish and saw a small crowd gathering.

This was it. The memory of the 2009 injury and DNF could now be forever forgotten.
Grabbed the American flag, and the anthem began blaring.

Crossing the line, I finished about 7 hours slower than I hoped, but overall in a great mood. It was an awesome feeling shaking Steve's hand, and having Team Awesome be there for the photos. One of my favorite parts about having crew from all eras of my life at an event, is seeing friends of mine from different times of my life meet and become peas in a pod in just one weekend.

Thanks cannot be said enough to Amy, Nicole, Tina, and my parents, as well as Ghislain for riding alongside me at a time where I may have had another meltdown if left to my own thoughts. Just an amazing weekend.

So, to the resume, add the 2x, 3x, and 5x. Steve said it best:
"Those numbers add up to 10. Now you just have to go and do them all at once."

Word.

thanks for reading,
krp

Philosophy: Training with the Seasons and Cowboy-ing Up

2011-09-29T07:24:00.000-07:00

I am always astounded at how much the weather of the seasons of New England perfectly match my racing schedule.

In the winter, I am drawn to the gym. Not because of the snow and ice which I actually love, but because I just feel like lifting and doing something different than I've done all year.

Spring brings about renewal for most things, including an evaluation of where I'm at mentally, which has always been a time where I decide to recommit to racing and the demands of the training.

The long days of summer give me additional time to put in the long hours necessary to complete these events. The sunny days provide energy to do so.

Fall brings a lull in daylight, and training. The cooler temperatures give me a good reason to chill out on the bike, do a little more running, and generally tone down the training load. This creates a natural taper for the big fall races.

To follow a training regimen where every workout is planned for the next year sounds awful. I tried that about 5 years ago, and it quickly grew boring. I began to not look forward to training. It became work. The gains weren't even that great.

I see these athletes training by the 10% rule and shake my head. How can you possibly make leaps and bounds increasing things at 10%? The conservative, left-brained athlete is boring... following heart rates and numbers, and letting those things dictate their next workouts.

Did you know most professional triathletes are now doing 90% or more of their rides indoors on Computrainers, where everything is measured and evaluated?
I say ignore all that shit and be reckless. One of my favorite sports stories of all time is from the 1989 Tour De France, when Greg LeMond ditched all technology and told his team NOT to give him splits in the race's final time trial, and he made up an unbelievable deficit-over 2 seconds per kilometer- winning le Tour in one of the closest races of all time.

Believe in yourself, and listen to your body. Will yourself into the fitness you want, and train with the seasons. If you've made a commitment to training and it is your lifestyle, everything else will fall into place. The season is changing right this second, just step out the door.

krp

Jekyll and Hyde go to Lake Anna

2011-09-15T11:30:00.000-07:00

Well, it's that time of year again.
Cooler nights. Shorter days.
It can only mean one thing.
Ultra Tri season is here.

I've been on the fence for...well...all summer about going to Virginia for the Triple Iron. One day I'm in. Next day I'm not.
It all has to do with money, and I hate that. So much.

The reality is that, no matter what my situation is financially, I gotta do it.
What I achieve down there has nothing to do with being a fitness dork, nor does it have anything to do with the accomplishment of doing 3 times the distance of what many consider the pinnacle of triathlon.

It's the silence in the water, in between the coughs of Lake Anna exiting my lungs.

It's the calm and settling in of night 1, knowing that by the end of the night and the rise of the next sun, I will still be there. Pedaling. Perhaps tranquil in the gray predawn light, or maybe half asleep and full of despair, or if I'm lucky, I'll be in angry-zombie-biker- mode, clicking off fast, hard laps. Race mood swings have earned me the nickname of Jekyll and Hyde.

It's the sound of my own footsteps, rhythmic in the night, looking up the gigantic hill that looked so gradual 30 hours ago.

I need these things every fall, to remind myself why I walk out the door every day and lace up my running shoes.
Why I've made so many sacrifices in my life in pursuit of not so much fitness, but enlightenment.
The last few years, I have entered the water at Lake Anna and seen the dimension where the rules of the universe no longer apply, delving into a world of absolute weakness and absolute power.
Each time, I have exited a new and stronger person.

I don't want to race at Lake Anna.
I need to.

krp

Deca Etc

2011-08-25T03:52:00.001-07:00

Well, the ball's rolling on Deca 2012.
It's good to get this started early, and hopefully be wrapped up ASAP so that any curveballs we get can be knocked out of the park.
Once bitten, twice shy.

Something's been simmering in my head for a couple of years, and I feel like, since we've started the process of getting to the Deca so early, I can add this tidbit.

I learned something from the quintuple.
It was not actually during the race, but the events surrounding the homecoming from Mexico, and specifically from something someone said to me at one of the many functions(which I greatly appreciated).
"You must be so proud of yourself."

It was her way of congratulating me, but inside, I almost puked.
Suddenly, the thought of how selfish this all seemed marred everything.
The whole time, I had been envisioning a team effort from a community of people, and I just happened to be the representative.

That being said, I want to....no, I need to go to the 10x with a purpose greater than my own, but I am conflicted.
I refuse to hand money that I've raised to "Cancer Research", or any other large organization, knowing that it may end up buying someone's lunch at a networking meeting.
I've worked for large companies and organizations and seen how loose funds can be.
Eric Hoffer once said,"Every great cause begins as a movement, becomes a business, and turns into a racket."

I want receipts.
I want results.
I want to see progress and products.
And, I'm going be a fucking nazi and follow up.
In short, after the 2012 year, I need to know that you all and I have made a real, visible difference.

So, I need your help. Ideas of who we can work with that actually wants to take action, have a good time doing it, and change lives.
Low income area fitness programs?
Sponsoring homeless people to get back on their feet?

I don't know, it's 7am, and my coffee hasn't kicked in. Shoot things at me.
kalepoland@yahoo.com or send me a facebook message.
The Party Brigade now has a higher purpose than just getting KaleRP to the start line.

Let's do this.

krp

anomaly

2011-07-27T13:37:00.000-07:00

anomaly
i walk this earth on two feet
but it feels like, to me, to be
human is weak
the feelings, the pain, you can have just have it
i'll turn myself into a beast
like it's magic
tragic:
to become just a slave to the race
is it you, or is it me
that needs to be
put in their place?

krp

Rambling

2011-07-14T08:54:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure how I need to write this.
Bear with me.

There are a lot of questions and hypothetical scenarios swirling about right now.

For the last 8 months, there has been no real career plan...no LIFE plan.
Only a race plan: Deca 2011. All else: secondary.

Plane tickets for Mexico were paid for by Katherine, whom I was coaching.
All I needed was my entry fee, which I could have easily had paid for.

A few weeks ago, my plan was flipped totally upside down when I came from the woods: Mexico was cancelled.

There would be a new race in Italy, 1 month prior to the scheduled Mexico race, but my tickets would not be transferrable.

I set about looking for options, but my being in the mountains for 10 days at a time, with only 3 full days off, would be a large hinderance. Who could sponsor me? How could I raise this money? The budget would total more than $5,000 just to cover the most basic arrangements- not including food, or flying my bike, or other unforeseen expenses.

The hard truth is that I cannot get this together in the next 2 months, having only 6 full days off per month...the other 24-25 being away from any and all technology. Doing the math, I only have 9 days to get this together before I would have to think about leaving for Italy.
Who could have predicted my life choices, always passion-motivated, would virtually kill my chances of racing a Deca in 2011?

That was not easy to write, as I have only hinted around it to my parents and a few others.

Could this last-minute cancellation of Mexico be some kind of divine intervention?
Kale, get your life together.
Kale, these efforts are selfish. Get a cause.
Kale, get a career.
Kale, get some more racing under your belt first.
Kale, you're going to be 30 next year.
Kale, use your scorn as fire for next year, a la Triple DNF=Quintuple Finish.

Do I want to go another winter in a job I absolutely hate, or do I look for a compromise...a job with benefits that I can deal with year-round?
As you can see, there are a lot of things going on in my head, and this is why I maybe need to take some time and focus up after this summer of fun in the mountains.

The temporary closing of 1 door opens many others for the fall.
I'll go back to Virginia, and finish the Triple. Get back to my running roots and try to improve my times in ultras.
Not a step back, but a lateral step, to become a faster, tougher Ultra triathlete for 2012, where the Deca will be a priority.

I REALLY want to thank those that have believed in me all along, and supported me mentally or financially.
This is not an easy thing to deal with, having looked forward to it since the second I crossed the 5x finish line, but I take solace in the fact that every down has an upswing, and I ALWAYS make sure the upswing is equal or greater.

Part of me is still waiting on a miracle to come through, but I have to also look at reality.
The miracle-hoping side of me is the same side of me that just assumed sponsors would come flocking to me by the dozens after my Quintuple finish, which they did not.
Still considered very young for these distances, I plan on some pretty big things in the next 10 years.
The only thing I can do is keep putting notches in my belt, and more importantly to me now than ever: inspire and help people in the years to come.

"New life, in place of, old life....unscarred by trials" Pantera

krp

2011-06-30T09:49:00.000-07:00

simplicity: impossible
a carrot over my head

never to be reached?

escape to the high peaks
only to find a valley

time out
morphs into
a time out

"think about what you've done"
sitting on rocks, basking in the sun
no distraction

but, for once
i could use one.

Inspirations Series: Part 1- Bruce Bell

2011-06-10T10:19:00.000-07:00

It was my first week of middle school.

Things were....odd.
If this was to be expected, I sure didn't know it.

A lot of things had changed since I "graduated" from 6th grade.
I had gone from confident kid with buck-teeth to lanky, ugly, insecure 7th grader, in 3 months flat.

This also happened to be the only September in my short career as a student that I wasn't signed up for a sport.
I spent most of my childhood fall months running around like a chicken with my head cut off on a soccer field, and even caved to peer pressure the autumn of 6th grade and signed up for football. If I was no good at soccer, you can only imagine what football did to my psyche.

My only grade school redemption: Gym Class and the 1 mile run.
I couldn't hit. I couldn't catch.
Tackle? Ha.
I could, however, put one foot in front of the other faster than almost anyone else in school.

So here I was, September of 1995, teetering on the precipice of anonymity. Perhaps even worse as a 13 year old- I had no clique. I needed....something. I just wasn't sure what that something might've been.

It was mid-week, at the end of the day. I departed my last class, and began the journey up the stairwell to my homeroom, from which we extracurricular-less students would be put on a bus and destined for home.

A middle-aged guy in glasses, shamrock-colored polyester pants, a white shirt, and matching green tie passed me. I had seen him once before, but couldn't remember where. All I knew was that he was the Wood Shop teacher and Cross Country/Track and Field coach: Bruce Bell.
I had never previously thought about running Cross Country, so I surprised myself when I stopped him on an impulse and asked if I could run this fall. He smiled, shook my hand, and told me to come to the meeting next week.

The meeting blew my mind.
I remember sitting in his Wood Shop classroom, him lecturing about running, practice, and interspersing life philosophy all at the same time. What really hit me: he was talking to us like adults. This was something none of my teachers had done yet.
As an early teen, all you hear is,"do this or else".
This "real talk" was captivating. You wanted to attract his attention just so you could feel like an adult in talking with him.

Bell did things that no one could get away with nowadays.
He swore. He flirted with women. He was famous for cracking jokes about how he pissed his wife off while doing some home improvements the night or weekend before- think Tim the Toolman. There was nothing creepy at all about it; his personality was extremely non-threatening, and everything came across in good fun.
He'd bring a duffel bag full of pills and athletic supplements to work with him every day, and on occasion, with a note from a parent, would give his young athletes zinc or vitamin c tabs.

Bell was an anomaly in the middle school teaching arena. The longer you knew him and his eccentricities, the more his legend seemed to grow.
There were rumors that he would run from his house in Augusta to school in Turner, then at the end of the day, run home.
He could do more pushups and core exercises than any of us, and sometimes egged us on jokingly as we were laying on the grass trying to keep up with him.

He'd make us drink "ultra fuel" before each race. I remember him pulling one of us aside every week, and giving us 5 bucks and telling us to go to the juice machine in the cafeteria, where we were instructed to buy as much of every type of juice as the 5 dollars would allow. No one really knew what exactly was in those 5 gallon Gatorade drums, but it was a crazy mixture of powders and a plethora of juices.

In the classes that he taught and even before every practice, he might skip the intended subject matter altogether and instead go on tangents about life lessons. While it may not have been to the school's liking, a lot of kids who may not have had guidance at home(or from the guidance counselor, for that matter), received it from him. I know of kids who stayed eligible for sports, and not just in cross country, because of his foot up their ass when their grades were in danger.
If a kid didn't have money for dinner on the way home from a race, he wouldn't even blink before handing over cash.

Bell would tell you exactly what he thought, and if that included swearing at you during a race or in school, so be it.
If you acted like a drama-kid, he would promptly tell you to cut the shit.

I had zero running form as a kid. If I had a dime for every time he yelled at me from across the field," GOD DAMN IT KALE, STOP HUNCHING OVER. RUN TALL!", I'd be counting stacks of money instead of writing this. I still run races and think of how I need to get my hips under me. Thanks, Bell.

Before every race from middle school to high school, he'd have all of us get on the school bus, where he'd play out the expected scenarios of each race. He would tell us what he wanted all of us to accomplish, making eye contact and singling each one of us out, laying out his expectations for every individual, and for everyone else to hear. We each had a goal, and we were all there to help each other with it.
We'd step off that bus every time in the minutes before the race, in a fury and ready to burn up the course.

If we failed and tried hard, there was never sympathy. If you were particularly hard on yourself, he would tell you to suck it up and that you'd get 'em next week.
If we failed because we didn't put in our best effort, the next week of practice was miserable, and he made it known why.
It set us straight.

In a world quickly blossoming to a place where no one was responsible for their own actions, Bell made every effort to mold us into upstanding citizens on and off the course. Nowadays, the number of educators and coaches like him is unfortunately few. New societal standards make it hard for a teacher or coach to step in and do or say the things he did. While we can't create people like Bruce, we can definitely be thankful for the ones that are.

thanks for reading.
krp

To The Point

2011-05-04T12:58:00.000-07:00

It's been brought to my attention that this blog has been ignored for about 2 months.
That hasn't happened in a very, very long time.

I guess it's because I'm doing a lot less talking this year, and a lot more doing.
I cannot deny that something is different this year.
My body is tougher post-Quintuple.
It's as though I found a new pain reference, and it increased my tolerance exponentially.

My mind has also transformed, and not just in reference to pain tolerance. I've spent the better part of the last 5 years analyzing what path my life was taking. Now, I'm accepting and embracing that this IS my life. It's who I want to be, even if it doesn't exactly pay the bills yet. For now, I am just going to target the hardest races in the world, do them, and what happens, happens.

So yeah, been training hard, and trying to figure out ultimately just how far I can take this... and how I can make that financially happen.

I'm at a point right now where my body can take anything I give it. I've done more long bike rides pushing big wattage than I can count already, and my running is very solid.
Swimming I haven't focused on yet, but my upper body is developing just fine from my job lifting boxes up and down all day. I am not concerned about the swim.

Next weekend, I will do a Double Iron, alone. I'll have some family and friends there throughout the weekend, but will largely be solo for 4.8 miles of swimming, 224 miles of biking, and 52 miles of running. Come on out: I should be on Pleasant Pond Road from about noon on Saturday through Sunday Morning.
It'll be an appropriate test for things to come later this year, for sure.

Thanks for tuning in!
Kale

Clarity Day 2011

2011-03-07T07:20:00.000-08:00

I've been blogging a lot less lately.

Maybe it's because I've been in this funk the last month or so.
It always comes this time of year for me. It's the time of year where it feels like winter has run its course, but is still very much here.
The pull of tights-less runs, warm sun, and longer days is very real.
So real, in fact, that waking up to snow falling from the sky and 15 degree nights bring about despair.

The good news is knowing the time change is coming, and that a month from now, warmer temperatures will be a reality.

Winter can be tough on my training regimen, but there is always a day that I can pinpoint every March that my training took a turn for the serious.
It usually is brought about by a workout where I know I've turned a corner on a physical and mental level simultaneously.

That day was yesterday.

Thankfully, because even though in the back of my head I know that day will come, I spend most of every february wondering when. Until that day comes, I am in a complete mental fog.

Soon, the crazy stuff will be the regular, and my mind will be crystal clear.
Training heavily gives me plenty of time to sort out the whats, whys, and hows of my life.
Bring on summer.

krp

bring it

2011-02-10T09:44:00.000-08:00

i crouch at a squat

laughing
negatives on my back
pour it on
so i can use it

whatever is not said
i put words in their mouth
assuming
creating my own fuel

photosynthesize my own enemies
and harvest my own power

a famine never exists
even though i am
always hungry

bring it.

Prodigal Athlete

2011-01-31T07:41:00.000-08:00

This morning at 6am, I couldn't help but notice that daylight in all of its glory is on the way back to us.

It's triggering a lot of feelings, strangely.
Sunlight. Summer. Long days and warmer nights.
Big training volume, and perhaps the most peculiar, the two big fall races.

I have spent only 14 days in Monterrey, and less than a week total in Lake Anna, Virginia... yet, they have a very strong home-like pull to me.
Why?

Is it because of the 'round-the-clock racing, and the fact that, by the end of the event, you know every crack and bump in the road?
Is it because, by the end of the weekend, those strangers in the tent next to you are now your friends, who you look forward to seeing the next year, as soon as you leave the course?
Or is it the immense high of a hard-fought finish? On paper, it's the individual highlighted as the finisher, but really, your friends have stayed up all night, stressing about whether to put one scoop of powder or two into your bottle, and at what hour you should sleep. Indeed, their struggle may be more than yours.

I cannot deny that I look forward to these races in a way that is much more than an athlete testing his fitness. They are spiritual journeys to the center of your being. Finding out what you are made of is never an ego building event. In a world where everything comes easily , it is refreshing to have to fight.

Alas, there are over 8 months until the Triple Iron, and 9 until the Deca Iron.
There will be many fights over the course of those months. There will be injuries. There will be long nights spent without sleep. There will be financial struggles.
The path to the Deca will be long and hard...such is life.

I will battle, with help from my army, The Party Brigade.
And when we get to Lake Anna and Monterrey, the event will be a glorious conclusion of what was 2011.
Maybe that's why these events feel like coming home.

krp

I'm Alive

2011-01-27T06:56:00.000-08:00

About this time last year, I had already done a 50 miler on a treadmill, overnight.

I figured it was about time to step the game up, so I ventured out on my big gear single-speed road bike for a long ride to NH from Turner.

Froze my butt off, and my toes, too.

I was a little apprehensive about riding that bike for that distance-previous long ride on that bike was MAYBE 30 miles- but sometimes I get these very strong ideas in my head and can't shake them. I really love the idea of a single speed. Simplicity. Lightweight. And it makes you strong. When you are going uphill, there's no option but torque.

The reason for wanting to push so many watts for so long is that the Deca format this year is going to be less about long, easy saddle time and more about getting a fast time for each 112 mile bike ride...for 10 days straight. The faster I finish an Iron distance race each day, the more sleep and rest I can get to prepare for the next day.

There will also be lots of 5ks, 10ks, and marathons this year. More hard running, less zone-out 6+ hour runs this year.

Meanwhile, I've been trying to figure a way financially to Steve's new race, the Double Iron in Florida this year, in March. Yesterday's ride definitely tells me I can be ready in the next month. I would guess I need to raise about a grand. Thanks to a couple friends and family, I have a few contacts that I'll be pursuing. The goal is to create a relationship with the sponsors. I want to give them tons of publicity for however they choose to help.

The Double Iron would put me on track for the rest of the year. The fitness and mental strength gained from a race that hard, this early in the year would be HUGE in the prep for November.

Well, I guess I better get to work. Happy trails!

kp

Fight

2011-01-24T18:49:00.000-08:00

Pain

The menace lurks
I go against the grain
Responsibility unshirked

Sacrifice: not in vain

Pain

Initially acute
And soon all-consuming
life around me mutes
The monster staying, looming

Pain

The black spot unshining
Amoeba of reaching fingers
devouring... dining

unwelcome guest lingers

Pain

Rigormortis,I'm stiff
Eyes red, I grimace
One year of "what if"
It's time to finish

10x

The Adventure That Was 2010

2010-12-27T08:14:00.001-08:00

I only need one sentence for an introduction into the recap of the adventure that was this year:

2010 was a direct result of the fire in my blood created by my DNF at the Lake Anna Triple Iron.
The older I get, the more I realize how true the old saying "everything happens for a reason" is. I used to hate that saying, but that DNF was the best thing to happen to me.

I spent only a couple weeks with my tail between my legs after the Virginia 3x.
After I was healed, I went right to work at Northern PT.
Troy put together a collection of exercises that would prevent the injury from happening again.

Mortland and I kicked off the New Year with an Overnight Treadmill 50 Mile Run in mid-january. It was mind-numbing. I said I would never do it again, but I cannot guarantee that anymore. It was a good mental toughness exercise.

A couple of months later in March, I agreed to do a winter Death Race. I made it through the first night in some tough cold, lugging logs up a mountain with no snowshoes among other things, and after realizing that it wasn't actually a run, but a task-oriented race, I dropped. I simply wasn't prepared for that type of race.
Funny, I told the TV cameras I wouldn't do it again, but that was technically a DNF...and that makes me want to go back.

In May, I attempted a 100 mile run at the same venue in Vermont, and experienced one of the strangest weather events of my entire life. The race started in the morning, in cold and pouring rain. As the day went on, the course turned into shin-deep mud all the way around. For some reason, I had no energy, and dropped around 35 miles in, opting to drink beer with Sperv and Anneliese. We sat on top of the mountain, helping other racers. The afternoon saw thunderstorms, then freezing temperatures, then hail, and snow with driving winds.

Only a couple weeks later, as part of the Northern PT team, I used the Aroostook Relay For Life as a training event...running 50 miles through the night on a quarter mile track. This was one of my favorite events, because I got to blend my favorite activity with my favorite people. To run all night, with some company with friends here and there throughout the night, was just awesome.

10 days later, I attempted to run a 200 mile relay solo. All of the previous racing turned out to be too much, and I only made it 55 miles before having some pretty big IT band problems, dropping. Nevertheless had a super weekend with Nicole and my mom, bar hopping in Killington.

By this time, I had transitioned to living in a tent, because I knew money would be tight for my races later in the year.
I spent the summer living everywhere.
Anywhere I felt like staying. I also became very close with people who opened their homes to me on numerous occasions.

The next event was 24 Hours Of Great Glen in August. I went there with great confidence, having done a lot of ultra cycling, and was humbled. Only 13 hours into the event I was TOASTED. Mountain biking is a lot different than road cycling, that's for sure! Nevertheless, I REALLY enjoyed that event, despite my lackluster performance. Didn't matter, really. I don't care about results...just finishing the goal events.

September was the Double Iron. Battled some heat and a crappy attitude to finish injury-free, which was the ultimate goal. The perfect primer for the BIG event.

I used the next 2 months to wrap my head around a Quintuple Iron, and make the necessary training adjustments.
Turns out, the mental preparation worked, because it hurt a lot less than I thought it would. There was never any doubt during the 5x that I wouldn't be back for the Deca in 2011.

The amount I learned about training and racing this year is just out of this world, and I cannot wait to apply it to next year, when I will actually try to RACE the events, not simply finish.
I still continue to battle the balance of life. While it would be nice to train full time and not work, that is just not a feasible option. The bills must get paid, and ultra events don't exactly get you rich.

2010 was easily one of the best years of my life.
Following three tough years, I guess it was time for it.
Thank you all so much for your support, and thanks for reading!

krp

Coming of Age in Monterrey: The Quintuple Report

2010-12-01T13:47:00.000-08:00

It's 7:30 on a warm evening in Mexico.

My eyes and face burn from extended chlorine exposure.
It's a challenge to hold my tired body up on my bike, while I attempt to follow the police car through Monterrey- my escort from pool to race course.

I've just swum 12 miles and am now preparing my mind to race for the next 5 days.

I pass an armed guard every hundred feet during the mile from the pool to the Olympic Training Center, and each one mumbles something into his two-way radio, probably saying "He's here", or "He's on his way to you".

The police escort signals for me to go left, I enter through a gate, coast 150 yards, and the sudden realization that it's going to be a long week sets in.
I won't be leaving this course for a while.

Before I start the 560 mile bike ride, I grab my MP3 player, a few drinks that I pre-made before the race, and snag some beans and rice from the kitchen located directly off the course.

I pedal around the course for a few hours, trying to mentally relax my arms and shoulders, which are totally spent from the swim.
Not being able to use MP3 players in the USA, the new feeling of being in an event with my own music in my ears is a HUGE boost.
I'm rapping and swearing out loud and loving every minute of it. Probably the other guys are thinking,"Who is this crazy American?!"

Around midnight, I'm pretty tired and itchy still from the chlorine, so I choose to run up to my dorm room- only a hundred yards from the course- for a nice shower and nap.

Set my alarm for 3am. 2.5 hours sleep, right? Wrong.
I sleep through the alarm and bolt upright at 6am.
Make that 5.5 hours of sleep.

I think, Shit. Nothing to worry about really. It's so early in the event that probably the extra sleep will help me long-term.

DAY 2
I grab some breakfast from the kitchen and jump on my bike, knowing today is going to be one loooooooooooooong day.
It's surprisingly cold compared to what I expected. Maybe high 40s or low 50s.
As the sun comes up, the course(which is not closed to the public) starts filling up with runners, bikers, and rollerbladers.
And ducks... which have an uncanny habit of ambling across the course every morning around 8. They have ZERO fear of anyone, and there are near-collisions every lap and every day until 9 or 10am.
Jorge, the Race Director, had mentioned them at the Opening Ceremonies: "I can't control them. It is nature. If you hit them, we will cook them!"
Excellent.

Every hour and a half to two hours, I have to stop, make my own drinks, and get my own food.
By tonight(night two), I find this to be extremely time intensive and very counter-productive.

In regards to being crewless, normally I would be just getting into a rhythm and feeling great, when I would have to stop.
Getting back into the same mindstate is never easy.
A few other teams(Team Kurtz and Griesen) helped me out here and there, but I could definitely see the benefit of having a crew.

I ride some more, and again retire to the dorm room; this time around 4am.
Shower.
Sleep for an hour and half, and I'm back at it.

DAY 3
Another long day on the bike ahead.
My morale isn't that good. I know that I have to go through at least one more night of cycling.

Most times, I consider myself a night owl...but knowing that I am about to spend the next 22 hours on my bike saddle, with my ass already sore, isn't the best mood-lifter.

Not an easy day. My neck is tired. My hands going numb. My legs feel ok, but overall body and mental fatigue are definitely setting in.

The night is exponentially worse.
I'm frustrated every time I have to dismount for food and drink...for a number of reasons.
1) Everytime I get off the bike, I'm not going forward.
2) My rhythm and mental state gets broken.
3) Removing my aching ass from the saddle hurts, but putting it BACK ON the saddle is 20 times worse.

Wayne Kurtz, racing the Deca, rolls up to me around 11pm and we talk for a while. It's great to finally meet him and chat. We discover that we have a lot in common.
By 2am, I'm smoked, so I opt to hit the room for a shower and nap.

Day 4
An hour and a half of sleep, and all of a sudden, I'm happy again...mostly because I know that this is the morning I finish the bike.

By 4am I'm back on the course, with a bowl of last night's beans and potatoes stuck between my aerobars. By this point, I've mastered the art of eating full meals while pedaling away.
I've got Deca guys asking me every couple laps,"How long 'til you're done the bike?" They all look at me funny when I tell them I have no idea.
The whole week, I've made it a point to NOT know where I'm at mileage-wise. Mostly because in my head, I don't want to know until I'm close to done.
It's a good thing.
Less mind games with myself, calculating and extrapolating lap times.

Around 11am, I know I've got to be close.
The timing dudes confirm this, and I just start going nuts. I'm so excited to be getting off the bike that I start ripping off 3:30 laps. I get so caught up in the moment that I actually finish the bike and start doing another lap without realizing it. After a half lap, they cut across the course and tell me I'm all done.

Cool.
I take my time, eat a good meal, and change into my running gear.
My mood is super high, but tempered by the fact that now I have to run twice as far as I ever have before.

When I think of the bike, I think of miserable nights. Remembering the run, it was afternoons that hurt the most because of the extreme heat.

This first afternoon sets the tone for the rest of them. It is HOT.

I run for about 4 hours before sitting under the tent for a few minutes with a number of drinks and food... just trying to get cool and counting the seconds until sundown.

Completely SICK of beans, rice, and insect-covered food, I order a big salty pizza from Domino's and run until it arrives.
Once there, I fill a bottle with Powerade, grab the entire box of pepperoni and ham Americana, and have the happiest lap of the entire race.
To say it tastes amazing would be the biggest understatement in the history of the world. The Danish Team gets a kick out of the whole scene, and somehow a picture of me with the pizza that they take ends up in a Danish newspaper.

For the first night of running, I just focus on being happy. I do a bunch of laps with Nick Mallett from Australia, which is great because he is coming off the bike and because of that, in a really good mood.
Sometimes I'm annoyed by other people in good spirits, but tonight it's contagious.

At 4am, I hit the tent for a quick nap.

Day 5
Another 1.5 hours of sleep, and this time, I really am not enthused about starting my day. I get some crappy coffee from the kitchen and sit down to a breakfast of about 4 million pancakes.
My policy when I'm not happy is "Eat everything until morale improves."

It kind of works this time.
I don't remember a lot about Day 5... only that it was long and hot and my feet were beginning to swell.
Every couple of laps I would lay down for 5 minutes with my feet up. It seemed to do the trick in the short term.

By nightfall, I just want to be done. I make a mental commitment to myself to not sleep, because sleeping means not moving forward...and what the heck, I can't feel much worse anyways.

At 4am, my feet are aching terribly. It's not a muscular thing.
I can feel it in my bones. I take off my shoes and my feet seem to just balloon out. All I can envision is a million little stress fractures.
No way I'm going anywhere for a while.

Knowing I only have another marathon left, I sleep for a good 3 hours.
Despite my feet aching, I'm kind of happy.
I figure I could be done by noon or 1pm.
A 5 hour marathon should be easy, right??
Wrong.

That last marathon was the physical equivalent of nails down a chalkboard.
Every step hurt worse than the next.

As noon rolls around, I realize that a finish is still hours away. My mind and body are so tired. It is impossible to focus on the fact that I am DEFINITELY going to finish; I can only focus on the fact that I'm not finishing NOW.

I spend a good two hours being a miserable prick. I am angry at not being done, and being kind of irrational, that is, until out of nowhere, I realize that I am within 10 miles of the finish line.
All of a sudden, my legs and feet and shitty attitude don't matter anymore.
I put the hammer down and don't stop for drink or food or bathroom breaks.

On my second to last lap, I see Wayne on his bike, and ask if I can use his American flag to take on my last lap around. Obviously he says yes.
His crewman Rick hands it to me and I start crying immediately, because I know within the next fifteen minutes, this whole journey is going to be over.

The last lap is still surreal, 2 and a half weeks later.

All of the bikers in the Deca and Double Deca are whistling and congratulating me and just making a huge raucous.
Everything that happened within the last year ebb and flow through my mind.
The sacrifices financially and socially.
The tent living.
The couch crashing.
Everyone and everything that had gotten me to this point.

Wayne stops mid lap to give me a hug. A couple minutes later, Eileen does too.
The last half mile, I run some, walk a little, laugh, cry, and take it all in.
It's a celebration of the event...the whole year, actually, and crossing the finish line is a culmination of it all.

While I have larger plans for 2011, I know that this finish will always be one of the most special because during the year leading up to the event, I learned who my real friends were, and how much a community of friends and family can help one person achieve their goals.

I will always remember what people did for me to get to Monterrey. What a year.

krp

2010-10-25T09:28:00.000-07:00

Maybe I didn't realize the longterm implications of the Tentman Experience.

I've just spent the last 5 nights in a Seattle hotel.
Comfortable beds, but wow.

Sleeping in a bed messes with my body. My back is stiff. My shoulder hurts.
Is it sleeping in a bed, or not training much the last few days? I dunno.
I'm just glad I have Northern PT to right all my wrongs. Very excited to get there on wednesday, catch up with Troy and the gang, and get some work done.

The Big Race is but a mere 20 days away. Gotta train REALLY hard this week.

I've done the planning, the training, answered all the questions, and yet... The gravity of what I'm about to attempt has not sunk in yet.

People ask if I'm getting excited. I will generally say yes, but more than anything, the underlying emotion is fear and focus.

I went to the Lake Anna 3x last year pretty much thinking I could do anything I wanted. Limits were found, and my body came apart.

Knowing that I am not invincible has given me a different take from last year as I make my final preparations for Monterrey.

I must be more organized, and more mature in my attitude towards the distance. Respect.
Being crewless, the need to stay mentally sharp in order to feed myself correctly will be critical.
I guess this means less sleepwalking.

Fear and focus.
I think I'm in the right frame of mind.

krp

Free For the Taking

2010-10-14T05:50:00.000-07:00

FREE to a good home:
Race Nightmares.
Come take them off my hands.

Last night, I was in a Double Iron in Africa.
It included a gnarly obstacle course in the middle of the run, and I got the bright idea to do it barefoot. Blood was gushing out of my feet, and everyone but me was concerned about it, until I passed out from blood loss.
Race: Over.

Let's see, what else is free?
A couple of publications doing stories on your's truly.
The Country Courier in central Maine, and a free Sports paper up here in Aroostook County.

I'm finding that what I love the most about the exposure has nothing to do with me. In honesty, it feels weird to have my ugly mug and name posted on stuff.

It is very cool to give my friends and family who've sponsored me some free advertising, and know that I could be helping their businesses out through my exploits. I'm having a lot of fun with it, and look forward to getting more efficient and better at it.

Just getting to the 5x is an extreme challenge... With the high risk of injury during training, expenses, and life in general.
I feel like with all of this support, compounded by being the only USA representative, there's no way I can fail.
ONE MONTH UNTIL RACE TIME

ramble on

2010-10-10T04:34:00.000-07:00

I've been glued to the live results at the double/triple this weekend. Congrats to Beat from Switzerland for just winning the Triple. I get to meet/race with him in the 5x in Mexico.
Also nice to see homeboys Sauerbrey, Kurtz, and Pasceri throwing down.
NO WAY I'm not going down to the 3x next year.
Gotta get that monkey off my back for sure.

Not much has changed.
The plane ticket to Mexico is bought, and I'm continuously bloated, like roadkill in the hot sun as I attempt to gain weight for the big race.

It's definitely harder to gain weight than I thought, but I have learned something important from all this over-eating.
Even though I'm constantly feeling the need to purge in one direction or the other, I have more energy from day to day when I train. More power.
Also, there's less daily bonking...which was always a problem.

Could it be possible I haven't been eating enough all along.. or am I just getting stronger as my muscles rebuild from the Double Iron?

Both? Either way, you can bet I'm going to keep at it and see what happens.

35 days away now.

I will have no crew, which will not make it any easier...but it can be done. More stops though. I'll look at it as an advantage. Don't want to get horned up and go too hard on the bike.

Crunch time.

seriously? seriously

2010-10-04T15:53:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm pretty much recovered from the 2x.

Let me spin you a tale of the next 3 weeks of my life:
Eat. Lift. Eat. Lift. Eat. Loooooong workout, eat.
Swim.
No sleep.

It is time to drop the hammer down. Hard.

I need to gain at least 8-15 pounds, so that my body doesn't completely eat itself by day 3 of the Quintuple.
Even after the Double Iron, Troy at Northern PT couldn't believe how much smaller my legs got..just from that race.

Ha, imagine it. I have to gain weight, but at the same time complete the longest bike ride, and longest swim that I ever have done-just for training.
Add to that an enhanced metabolism from sleep deprivation, and I would say it's an uphill caloric battle.
I love a challenge.
When I do succeed, I'll be about as jacked as I have ever been at about 185 pounds.

This has been a banner year, really, despite my DNFs. I still consider it a success. In the last 12 months:
-Triple Iron (7.2 mile swim, 336 bike, 34 miles of run completed)
-50 mile Treadmill run, overnight
-Winter Death Race...lived through the night and called it quits
-35 mile run at Mcnaughton Ultras
-50 Mile overnight run at Aroostook Relay For Life
-55 mile run at Green Mountain Relay
-24 Hours of Great Glen mountain Bike Ride
-Double Iron finish (4.8 mile swim, 2224 bike, 52.4 mile run)
-More long bike rides (100+ miles) than I can shake a stick at
That's well over 1 ultra event a month.
I'm ready to cap it now with my biggest finish ever.

Donations beginning to come in. You all have no idea how much this means to me.
It motivates me to train longer, and keeps me going when I am tired from sleep deprivation and don't want to go anymore.

41 days. I'm so ready to go to Mexico and hurt.

krp

There Goes My Hero, Watch Him as He Goes

2010-09-28T18:01:00.000-07:00

My hero died.
He was hit by a car on a training ride, just 3 miles from his home.

Somehow, it took me 4 days to learn of his death.
Lack of publicity in ultra-endurance sports- you gotta love it(not).

Jure Robic was NASTY. He was coming off his 5th Race Across America win. Dude could ride his bike from west coast to east coast in 8 days.
He was all about his sport.
He once said of RAAM, "I love RAAM, it is the hardest and the toughest. It gets into your blood like a disease."

He could have been rich, had he chosen to market himself. Instead, he used all of his time to ride. Put up or shut up.
One of his crewmembers said, "Jure is all legs and no head. He has to be that way to win these types of races. He could be making money with endorsements, but he is a bike racer, not a business man."
I could relate to this way of thinking. Screw all the begging and negotiating.
Just let me race.

Jure lived in a small apartment with his kid and wife, scraping to get by so he could race. He had no fluff in his life. I can't help but wonder if scraping to get by was what kept his hunger so high. Training and racing HAD to be his income. He forced it to be that way.

I feel like I knew a little bit of what was going on inside his head every day before he mounted his bike.
The financial struggle.
The obsession to do what you love.
The balance of "normal" life around training.

Maybe that's why I feel so sick about the death of someone I never even met.
So untimely.

Man, I really liked his style. I had hoped to meet him one day.
Here's to you, Jure.
krp

Revenge at Lake Anna

2010-09-20T12:12:00.000-07:00

I had mixed feelings driving down the 2.5 mile road at Lake Anna State Park on check-in night, last thursday.

We drove past the sign, and a zillion different memories from last October came flying into my mind.
Way more than I expected.
The highs of the bike ride when I finally found my legs at 260 miles in.
The cold nights. The fun and random mix of friends I had crewing for me.
The low of the second night of racing, when I got injured and had to drop.

I continue to be a student of my sport.

One thing is for sure.
You can do ultra running and ultra cycling.
You can do triathlons..but you have to tie the two together before you can actually become an ultra distance triathlete and learn what you need to do to succeed.

9 of us stood on the start line at 7am on friday morning.
3 of us had plans of Mexico in November. For us, this was just a training day.

The water was flat as glass as we made our way in.
Pretty comfortable temperature.
I settled into a slow pace, chilled out, and got into a rhythm.
I don't do a ton of swim training.
Of the 3 sports, it's the one I enjoy least, and feel has the fewest gains to be had per training time.
Obviously, that will change as I prepare for a 12 mile swim in a couple months. Don't want to be toast after the first discipline in Mexico.

Came out of the water dead last, but really feeling fine. I definitely hadn't wanted to be in the water for over 3 hours, but knew it was coming. Hey, you don't train, that's what you get. I was just happy to feel as good as I felt.
Only a little dizzy from the extended weightlessness of the water.

Changed up quickly, hopped on the bike around 10:45, and immediately went to work.
Even though this was supposed to be a "low pressure" race for me, I didn't like being last.
My continuous 12 hour ride in the last miles of the bike at the Triple told me I could sit for a long time, so the goal was to not get off the bike for the entire ride.

All was well until around 5pm.
The sun was beating down on the pavement.
It was around 90 degrees...temperatures we haven't seen up north in a while.
One of the racers from North Carolina passed me on the other side of the road and yelled,"What an awesome day for this!"

I yelled an obscenity at him. He laughed, but I wasn't joking. I was suffering.

At the end of the lap, I parked it. Toasted.
Dad and Tina got a big plastic bag of ice and I put it against my chest, hoping it would cool my core. They draped wet cold towels on my head and neck.
After 20 minutes, I was still hot as hell but knew I couldn't waste any more time.

Got back on the bike, made it around the first corner, stopped, and puked for a couple of minutes.
Good times. Chris Trimmer came by, and asked if I was ok. Yup.
Matter of fact, I was all of a sudden feeling great.

I spent the rest of the bike ride feeling pretty awesome. Much like the bike ride of the triple, my last 60ish miles were my fastest on the bike, averaging near 19 mph on some laps.

Parking my bike, I was pretty stoked because I knew I was going to finish the race. I knew I could do a 50 miler in my sleep.
Little did I know at that time that I actually would!

The run was great until around 4 in the morning.
Fatigue was finally setting in big-time, so I asked my Dad to come with me for a lap of the 1 mile out and back course.

We started walking, and the first half mile, it was relatively easy to stay awake.
Towards the turnaround, I staggered a little bit.

After the turnaround, I let Dad lead me, and dared myself to let my eyelids droop a little while I walked.
My head and shoulders were next. Feet shuffled.
Right foot went across my mid-plane and to the left of my left foot.
Next thing I knew, there was a white room with a Jeep door on the wall, and a room of people looking at it as if it were artwork.
I was dreaming, which meant I was sleeping, while walking.
That's a new thing for me.

The whole thing probably took less than 5 seconds until I snapped awake.
"You ok?" Dad asked.
I didn't answer, and just staggered as we made our way to the end of the lap.
Luckily, the sun was coming out.

I went solo the next couple laps, and when the sun finally rose up over the trees, I was alive again. Running.

Hours flew by, and around 11 the sun started getting intense. I was chafing in places I don't care to talk about, and the combination of heat and sleep deprivation made me extremely grumpy. In short, I was fried- both physically and mentally.

The last 3 laps took an eternity. It was like every minute took an hour, but quitting never crossed my mind.
I remembered laying on the doctor's table last October, right leg wrapped in ace bandage, as Matej from Slovenia finished. His national anthem played and people were going crazy at 5am. I was so depressed that I wasn't going to get that honor after I had trained so hard.

As they say, "What's past is past".
This was it. I was going to finish for sure. The last 100 meters I forced myself to run, flag in hand. Dad, Tina, and Sarah ran with me for a few meters, then let me have the finish line.
The national anthem played, I crossed the line, and it was over. Fantastic.

We spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out and waiting for Paul(an alligator wrestler, seriously)to finish, and talking about the battles we all had.

There really is nothing like the mood swings, consciousness changes, physical beating, and caliber of amazing people that is ultra triathlon. I'm hooked, and can't wait to race Mexico.

Big thanks to Kirb, Nick, Eileen, Dad, Tina, Sarah, and the rest of my support team in Maine and around the country. This would never have been possible if I had tried to do it all myself.

Thanks for reading,
krp

CONCLUSIONS
-I need to heat train somehow. There's no way I can endure 5-6 days of what I experienced this weekend.
-I got caught up in "racing" for no reason, a rookie mistake that I knew better than to do. For everyone else, this was their A-Priority race. This was just a long workout, and I forgot that. Had I been a little calmer on my bike, I probably wouldn't have over-heated as bad, and wouldn't have had to stop a couple times. Also, I might have paced the run a little smarter.
-Swim training in the pool needs to happen now. I have to get my mind used to the boredom of an 8 hour swim. Staring at a pool floor.

chasing

2010-09-12T14:59:00.000-07:00

5 days from this very moment, I'll be biking.

My ass will be chapped.
I will have already been racing for 11 hours.

I'll be thinking about how soon, I'll need to put my lights on, get a real meal in, and maybe add some arm-warmers as the temperatures begin to fall.

My mind will be wandering and starting to touch upon the idea that, in 6 or so hours, my undercarriage will be relieved...and my feet will be taking the burden of my entire body weight instead. However, thinking about the act of biking for the next 6 hours....not allowed.
That's a fast-track to moody-land.

The laps will blur, and I will enter my own mind, where I'll stay until it's time to clip out of the pedals for the rest of the event.

All it took was one race.
Last year, at the Triple, I found a state of being that I have not yet seen since that weekend.
It was so powerful. I was at one with my body. Completely in touch with every sense.

That first marathon after the swim and bike...it was like my feet never touched the ground.
Then everything came to a screeching halt. Ultimate high, to ultimate low, in less than 5 minutes.
The idea of finishing a big race while feeling like that is so locked into my head.
It's like...this amazing, reoccuring idea. A bolt of electricity that bounces between my heart and my brain. A spark, maybe.
I can't stop thinking about it...there is no choice but to chase the feeling.
I NEED it.

"It'll drive a cowboy crazy
It'll drive him insane
And he'll sell off everything he owns
Just to pay to play the game
And a broken home and some broken bones
Is all he'll have to show
For all the years that he spent chasin'
This dream they call rodeo"

This year is a lot different.
Last year, I was training for the Triple, and hadn't even done as much training as I have this year. I have never been more fit.
My goal for the 2x this friday is to find zen mode, and stay there, until that American flag is in my hands, and I'm crossing that line.

Thank you so much for your support thus far.
There are people "like"ing my facebook page that I don't even know.

This fills my heart with fire. More than ever. It's like I'm not going to this event by myself. There's an army, now.
No distance is safe anymore.

To the Hunt,

krp

not quite

2010-09-10T18:26:00.000-07:00

another cold night
walking that line

bike path, dim and dreary
road: never-ending

solitary

like a hamster on a wheel
my mind toils

money, progress.
the norms
why do i defy them?
i can't breathe.

a house on the hill?
or a tent inside the forest?
priorities.
i'm dizzy.

there's a hole, somewhere...
my soul hurts.

fill it with a run
stuff it with a bike
and ignore
til it comes back around

depression, the ulcer

what is this "normal"?
and why can't i find it

i'm always almost there
but never close enough
never close enough

krp

Only

2010-09-08T16:40:00.000-07:00

See, I have this thing.

I've been getting advice from deca finishers.
Kurtz. Lefferts. Steil.
All kick-butt, badass USA people.

In chatting with them, there's this word that keeps popping up. Only.

"It's only the quint."
"Use Lake Anna for a good tuneup. It's only a double, but will be a great finish for your resume."

I've found myself even saying it when talking about the double. It's only a double.
Only. Riiight.

Tonight it sank in that next week, I'm going to swim 4.8, bike 224, and run 52.
Only a double...
Truth is, it's still going to be tough, and at my young experience level, will probably turn me inside-out.

Am I nervous? Sure.
But it's a good nervous, not a crap-myself kind of nervous...like the 200 mile run, or even the Triple last year.

I feel pretty good, and have had to chill a little bit on the training this last week due to some minor things.
I'll be well-rested, so I can give things a good test.

It'll be a good stepping stone, and a great marker of where I'm at in the grand scheme of 5x.
67 days until the Quint.

ACT 2 -explicit-

2010-09-06T15:03:00.000-07:00

This is my favorite part of any story. FAVORITE.

You know...that edge-of-the-seat drama, where you don't know if the main character is going to make it or not.

I'm in a desert, with no water and no oasis in sight.
I'm under water, with a cement block around my leg.
I have a bag around my face with a noose around my neck holding it on.

This is what it feels like to be an athlete with zero backing.
I'm fucking dying here.

Ohhhh. The universe doesn't want me to do these races on so, so many levels.
There's no money.
There's no support crew.

I'm in shape, but I have no means to race without the entry fee payment, and without the help of people.

Maybe these are the defining moments of one's self.
Am I being tested...to see how bad I want this?
That's how I'm taking it.
In fact, I'm angry at the universe for even questioning my commitment.

I've lost friends. I've lost significant others.
I've lost my money.
I've put jobs in the shitter.

All of these, because my priority was to sport overall.
I mean, shit. I don't even have a PLACE TO LIVE.

There's faith that the people and crew will come.
I have some great people around me. Great friends.

The uplifting part is that in most movies, the main character comes out on top.
This won't be different.

If I have to eat Ramen and 88 cent cans of corn, living on the street... I don't care.
Sorry universe, but this race is going to fucking happen. Like it or not.

Dream Season

2010-08-30T05:18:00.000-07:00

It's getting to be that time of year.
Race season.

I know this because the dreams are starting.

In my race dreams, every terrible thing that can happen, does happen.

Last night, I got to the Virginia Double Iron. Lost my swim goggles.
Got into the water for the start, and somehow saw my goggles on the bottom of the lake. Even though the water was 3 feet deep, I couldn't reach them no matter how hard I tried.
Spent so long trying to get them that I missed the start.

The swim was a blur. When I got out of the water, everyone had been done so long that the race course was barely marked.

In trying to get to the transition area, I somehow got lost and navigated onto a different course, and started another race.
This race was like an obstacle course on a kids playground....in snow. All of my college friends were there, and pissed at me for missing the start of their race.

No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't keep up with anyone. Then, I woke up.

The nightmares will keep coming. With increased frequency.
Dream season is here. Great.

krp

busride writin'

2010-08-24T16:11:00.000-07:00

People ask me why
I don't really know
Gazing at the sky
I tell them I just....go

On the surface is my smile
A mask well-worn and fake
My soul is tread-upon tile
Something I can barely take

Underneath, a raging blaze
Consuming, seeking air
Let me just count the ways
I can ignite it, under there

At the center is my hate
For myself, inferior
My endurance is my fate
For choices made, interior

krp

Tempting the Triangle

2010-08-22T14:41:00.001-07:00

I tempted fate today.
Took my life in my hands, really.

Today, I dared Sasquatch, the Turner Beast, the Leeds Loki, and the Turner Triangle to tangle with me.

Laced up the running shoes and did what used to be my favorite on/off-road bike ride via my own two feet.

Ran up along the south end of Pleasant Pond, where I was disappointed to find that the dirt road ended with a house. No matter.
I bushwacked up to 117, ran down over the hill by the golf course, and linked up with 219 for a few miles.

Ambling past what used to be Twin Bridges Market in Leeds and admiring the new tar, I was reminded of a few nights prior. I was tooling along that road at 1am on a bike ride from Ellsworth to Turner, and happened to look over and see a nice buck with super long tines on his rack. Pretty awesome.

I hit the crossing of the powerlines and took a right, and followed them all the way to the intersection, where I could've gone to Landry's store, Addington Hill, or the Androscoggin River. I chose river, bub, hoping I wouldn't have to swim across to get back onto the Turner Flats.
Sure enough, I took the trail that dumped me out on the river. A trail went to the left, but a sign said "Keep out"...

Luckily the water was really low. I mucked it along the edge of the river, baffled at how many different types of animal prints were embedded in the sand. Raccoons, squirrels, deer, rabbits, etc. After a 1/4 mile of mudding and some wet shoes and feet, I cut across someone's property until I was on the main road.

Crossed the bridge, jogged down Cobb Road and memory lane as I ran by my aunt and uncle's old place, where I spent a lot of time as a kid. Weird how I remembered the the road and houses being so much bigger then compared to now.

Finished up on the road. 117 and back down Pleasant Pond road. No better way to spend an afternoon.

24 HOGGin'

2010-08-16T15:22:00.000-07:00

Just spent the weekend riding the mountain bike.
Literally, the whole weekend.

I was foolish enough to sign up for the 24 Hours of Great Glen, located...well...on the side of Mount Washington.
A lot of people do it in teams of 2 or 4, but some are dumb enough to try it alone. It's a test of will and skillz.

Trail description:
Lots of dirt road, interspersed with some singletrack. 8.3 miles.

Cool.
I figured, I've done a lot of biking...why not?
If it's a lot of dirt road, I should at least be able to pull off a lap an hour, right?
WRONG!

Cannon was fired at High Noon on Saturday.
I held a pretty good pace for 5 laps, but then the singletrack started really frustrating me and kicking my ass. It's not exactly a strength of mine.

It really is an art that requires good balance, technique, focus, and short bursts of high power.

I...um..have none of those. Just the ability to zone out and go for long periods. Can't really do that on a mountain bike.
I tried at one point around midnight in the race, and did a header into a pine tree.
Good Times!
Also, the amount of climbing was unbelievable...and I even like climbs.

BY 1am, I was COOKED and totally out of my element. Went to bed for 40 minutes to try and get some consciousness back, but had the usual "lay there and think about the race" thing going on. Falling asleep on impact of pillow is something I have yet to perfect in my Ultra races. It's frustrating to be tired and not sleep, knowing that it's going to help.

Came out of the tent totally pissed off and not in the mood to ride.
Did a misery lap. Got passed every 2 seconds. Seemed like every time I'd get a rhythm established, a relay team dude would yell "on your left!".
This compounded my frustration....even though most offered the seemingly standard "Good Job Solo!".

Rolled into the camp 2 hours later(mind you, this equates to a 15 minute mile). I could've easily run faster, and knowing this REALLY pisses me off.
I tell Nicole, Mom, and Dad(kick ass crewing job, by the way) "I'm going to bed, and not getting up until I sleep".

A couple hours later, they're opening my tent. Time to go.
Spent the next couple hours riding, saying I'm gonna stop after this lap.
I said that a few times.. but with each lap, I kept getting more inspired. Around 10:30am Sunday, I told the gang. "Well, I'm so miserable now, might as well go and make myself more miserable."

I am SO glad I chose to do the last lap. Met up with a ton of other Solos.
It was really a celebratory lap and an awesome end to a tough event.
We shared battle stories of the experiences of the 24 hours, and enjoyed the hot sun after the chilly night.

I'll definitely be back next year. At least I'll know what to expect!

Starvin Marvin

2010-08-10T04:56:00.000-07:00

I haven't updated in a long time.

Been BUSY. Busy TRAINING.

Holy moly.

I'm so far ahead of last year at this time that it's unreal.
I feel good. I'm fitter than ever. Now I just have to be smart....and now that I have more time on my hands(now I'm part time at work), I can BE smarter. Little things like injury prevention and weights are the things I just never had time for when I was working all the time.

It materialized like this:
Mark and I were working together. Both full time.
Store has slow months from now until November.
I have a mental breakdown, and realize: oh my word, I'm making the same mistakes as I did last year prior to the Triple.
Working too much. Not training enough. Not taking care of myself.
I propose that I take a small pay cut and work 25-30 hrs per week TOPS.
Done.

A HUGE weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
While I may have had some creeping doubts before about Mexico, those are long gone. I don't think anyone wants it as bad as I want it, and I mean that.
I wake up and think 5x.
I daydream about it all day.
I do every workout imagining I'm in the middle of the race.

I'm GLAD for those DNFs.
They've made me so hungry.
Shit, I'm starving...and in a few months, I'm gonna eat like a king.

Epics

2010-07-20T12:23:00.000-07:00

My name is Kale, and I have an addiction.

I can't stop thinking about the next Epic. It's all I can think about.
It pulls me through this mundane life of work, sleep, repeat.

For some people, escape is sex, drugs, or rock'n'roll.

Mine is food, bike, or run.

I know I'm different than the other endurofiends because they don't need it like I need it.
Like, NEED it.

I got humbled at the Green Mountain Relay. Thought I could stick out any problems, as long as I could walk. Turned out, when I was thrown into that situation, I didn't want to participate on terms that were less than my own high expectations...ie, walking. I put 16ish hours on my feet and said screw it.

Enter the next logical step: 24 Hours Around The Lake Race.

No distance per se, just time...running. I can deal with that.

It makes so much sense. This leaves out the negative mental talk of unfavorable pace projections, and sets me up for just doing my best for 24 hours....and I'm going solo. I need to find that mental toughness...that place in my head where nothing else matters but the finish, and that comes with having no one to talk to or lean on.

Perfect for getting my run game back on track for November, and it'll be my last long workout before 24 Hours Of Great Glen, a mountain bike race 2 weeks after that.

I'm happy about my fitness right now. I'm way ahead of where I was last year.
More ultra runs under my belt than any other year for this time of year.
My biking is WAY stronger than last year already.

Only thing slightly lacking is swim, but that comes rather quickly for me.

I'm ready for my next escape.

(hi)atus

2010-07-13T16:18:00.000-07:00

I bet you thought I forgot about The Path Less Taken.

My time during the TentMan Experience has forced me to reflect on this blog a little bit.

I've come to realize that somewhere along the line, this blog took a negative tone. Maybe I just needed somewhere to vent.

I took something really awesome, that only a handful of people in the world can do, and turned it into a major negative thing in my life.

That being said, it doesn't surprise me that the Tentman Blog has way surpassed the Path Less Taken in popularity.

Tentman is cool-headed and fun.
Endurance Geek is moody, negative, and serious. No one wants to read about someone bitching all the time.

I'm so glad I've moved to a tent. It's been great for my training and given me a new perspective on life. Having a slight hippy mindset might not be a bad thing, after all.

I'm reminded of the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta. Michael Johnson and Maurice Green were set for this "clash of the titans" in the 200 meter dash. Trash talking and acting like jerks, they both came to the line fueled with anger.

Neither made it to the finish line.
Both pulled muscles on the world stage and came up as losers.

Each of my last 3 races I approached as: I need to finish this or else.
Negative.

May the peaceful mindset of Tentman and the drive of Endurance Geek combine!

krp

rebirth

2010-06-25T06:38:00.000-07:00

The sun is out.
The birds are singing.

Today, folks, is a great day.

In reading a few of my last posts, one would probably wonder why the hell I'm doing this at all. I could almost agree. The first 6 months of this year have given me nothing but heartache and stress.

Luckily, my major running events are done for the year. Those are the ones that take the largest toll on my body. I'll still do a few longer runs of 50-75 miles, but nothing major. From here on out, it's about getting Bike Nasty and Swim Hardened.

I am stressed financially, physically, and mentally, in getting to Mexico, but I always remember this.
In any movie...any book that has to do with the pursuit of dreams, things are always terrible for a long, long time...until they get better.

William Feather once said:
"Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go"

There's a reason only a few people on the planet do this. It is so far from easy just GETTING to the start line...let alone what happens after the gun goes off.

Less than 5 months now, and I'm starting to visualize how sweet that finish line is going to be. I feel good and ready to start putting some monster bike mileage in.

Enough failure, it's time for success.

Thanks for reading.
krp

Three Times, No Charm

2010-06-20T04:48:00.000-07:00

I need to write this...for my brain.

This was kind of my worst nightmare.

I'd never DNFed before the Triple. Here I am now, DNF number 3, clinging to my back like King Kong on the Empire State.

A DNF in an Ultra has a much longer story than "I couldn't do it." Unfortunately, to outsiders of the sport, that's what it might look like: just excuses.

You know what it makes me feel like in their eyes? A bullshitter.

I believe in myself...and some people might say that's all that matters. Unfortunately, it's not at this level.
When you have people that have sponsored you with their product, time, services, or money, the expectation is rightfully some sort of result.

I'm extremely disappointed and humbled. This is the "fight or flight" moment.
My back's against the wall. I certainly don't feel excited about asking for sponsorship. I have zero results this year, thus far.
It's time for me fight. I have to focus on my limiter: flexibility. That's the ONLY thing stopping me in these races.
No structural issues. No mental weakness. Just tendons and muscles.

If you've supported me and continue to support me no matter what, I thank you. You are the true friends and my inspiration to keep fighting.

Thanks for reading.

krp

The Top Gets Higher

2010-06-02T15:03:00.000-07:00

"The top gets higher, the more that I climb"-Lil Wayne

I'm going out of my mind.
I need...something.

Financial sponsors are coming up dry.
I haven't heard anything positive from my agent, nor from the "sure bets" I thought I had.

Call me naive...I figured the terms "one of the only Americans", "world championships", and "quintuple iron" would be impressive enough to garner some type of help...but no.

I could take the lack of funding a couple of ways. I could quit trying.
Why not just throw it all in, right now, and say screw it?

While there's no one saying it out loud, or to my face, I see it this way:
"Kale, you aren't good enough."

I hear this, in my head. Every day.
It triggers my implosive personality, and out the door I go, slaying my own demons.
I feel like I need to prove it to everyone that doesn't believe in me.
To the people that talk behind my back, so that they may choke on their words one day.
To myself.

This is how I know that I can never stop, until I am the best.

I am sitting on 2 DNFs.
So what? One freak injury, and one illness.
Those are so far behind me now. I don't even remember what failure feels like.
One fact I remind myself is that, before my injury at the Triple Iron, I was slaying the run, on pace for a noontime sunday finish. That would have placed me in second.

I'm just tired.
Tired of scraping by to make this work.
Tired of living in this ridiculous small apartment.
Absolutely sick of paying bills and having to worry about my racing expenses at the same time.
I'm tired, but not tired enough to give up this dream of mine.

They say "After the darkest night, always comes a brighter day."

This dark night is going to last a couple more weeks.
Then, I am going to give potential sponsors something to care about.
Soon, you're going to want your business on my shirt.

I promise.

junk

2010-05-26T07:09:00.000-07:00

Lots of junk going on.
By junk, I mean junk.

Attempted to make the trip downstate sunday night so that I could see Nicole and do some hiking on some terrain over 1500' above sea level.
Broke down in Newport.
Waited for 2 hours for Nicole to come pick me up on the side of the road, then spent the next few days doing less hiking and more figuring out what to do with my vehicle, that is still in Newport.
I'm thankful that I've got family in the right places.
They're gonna go pick it up with the car trailer and then we can go from there.

Soooo, Nicole drove me up here last night, and now I'm carless until further notice.

I used to hate the saying "everything happens for a reason", but the older I get, the more I believe that there are forces that we cannot control.

Interesting that I sign up for a MAJOR event next month that's going to require me to be on my feet for 2 and a half days, and now, during the time I need to train the most, I have no car...forcing me to be on my feet to transport myself.
Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not.

In the mental junk department, I've got this internal hippie thing going.
I have all this stuff I don't need.
An apartment I only sleep in.
A car I use to commute for like, 1 mile at time. Ridiculous.
I want to get rid of it all.
It feels like I'm wasting money on things like car insurance, gas, and a roof over my head.
I don't need that shit.
I can sleep in a tent, for free, and I am capable of riding my bike for hundreds of miles at a time, as long as I have time to do it.
I would be saving like 700 dollars a month. That is HUGE.

Training wise, I have about 10 days of high volume via running/walking before I scale it back so that I may survive the ordeal next month.
I'm keeping the details of the event a secret till I'm done, because I'm sitting on two DNF's...and that doesn't feel good to me.
I think advertising what I'm doing only makes me feel stressed about completing it...which doesn't allow me to get into the right zen type mode.

It's hot here. Good Mexico training.

thanks for reading...

krp

jinx, you owe me a coke

2010-05-20T20:10:00.000-07:00

Guess it's time for an update.

It's interesting, learning the little things about one's self, psyche, and physical being, on this crazy journey of ultra triathlon training.

At first, I thought it would be really awesome to have my own website that made me look like "the man". I figured it would be awesome if it helped attract sponsors. If everyone knew what I was up to, they could track my progress...you know...keep me accountable and motivated, right?

Interestingly, wrong.
Expect some major changes to www.kalepoland.com. Why?

A couple of things, right off the bat. One, I cringe whenever I read my site. It talks me up, and frankly, I hate it. There's something within this sport that humbles you so much. You feel like really, it's not a big deal, even though the norms say otherwise.
Two, telling people what I'm going to do makes me feel like I have to stick to a schedule, which takes the adventure and spontaneity out of the training.

One of the great things about this sport is the ability to, on any given weekend, jump into a random century ride, do a marathon as an easy workout, or look at a map, point at a lake, and say,"I'm gonna swim that tomorrow".

That is why I love it so much. Adventure. Scenery. People that are so hospitable, awesome, and upbeat, that it would blow your mind.

Sometimes, I wish I could just give people the feeling I feel while training and racing. They'd be hooked.
Perhaps they might then understand why I've made so many life sacrifices to chase the feeling and these dreams.

Americans, as a whole, are getting dull and lethargic. In this subdued, mundane world of technology, safety regulations, insurance, seatbelts, helmets, lawsuits, and politically correctness, people need something that makes them feel alive.

Find it, make it your passion, and put the glimmer back in your eyes.

Enough just sitting there, thinking about it.
Go after it.

krp

DNF

2010-05-18T12:50:00.000-07:00

Friday, May 7th.
I'm up early, gathering all my race gear for tomorrow's event, the McNaughton 100. It'll be my first attempt at running 100 miles.
My tiny apartment looks like hell, and the clutter of backpacks, bottles, shoes, and random gear piled in the middle of the floor makes it look worse than usual.
The phone vibrates on the counter. Sperv's text: "Don't hurry, I'm running late."
She's hungover.
Awesome. Now I can make fun of her for 6 hours in a cramped space.
She cannot get away.

A few hours later, I meet her in Bangor, and we start our long drive to VT in her 40 miles-per-gallon, football-resembling car.
In Waterville, we stop for gas and a bathroom break. I come out of the bathroom just in time to walk by Sperv, paying for a hot dog at the counter. The guy getting rung up next to her looks at her, then the hot dog, and says:"you feelin' lucky tonight?"...I walk out and die laughing.

We hook up with Anneliese in NH, and it's a beeline to the Green Mountain state.
As we approach Amee Farm(the venue), I'm reminded of the Death Race I'd done there a few months prior. Lifting a 50 pound bucket of sand and wood up and down the mountain, in the snow, with no snowshoes, had given me tendonitis that took forever to shake..
Now, here I was, getting ready to go up and down that same mountain 10 times for a grand total of 100 miles.
Whenever you get an injury somewhere, it's always in the back of your mind.

We arrive at the farm and chill with Andy for a few minutes, enjoying an epic cow battle.
Andy informs us that the farmer actually lives with the cows. Apparently, this guy was hiking the Appalachian Trail, was picked up in this town last November, and just never left. I love it.

Leaving the farm, we snag some food, and drive up the dirt road(four-wheeling in the football) to Mile 5, where we set up camp.

For May, it is COLD, and we are on a mountain, so it's even colder where we are than at the Farm.

The 150 and 200 had started the day before, and throughout the night, the racers walk past our tents.
Even though I know whats going on and can completely understand, I am selfishly frustrated by the amount of noise their crew makes as they cheer and chat with the racers. It's impossible to sleep.

A few days before the race, I'd been sick, and tonight i'm really hoping for one last good night of sleep before running for 24+ hours. No avail.
I spend the night freezing in my tent, and wake up at 5am on race day to a sore throat and annoying cough. It's pouring, and 40 degrees.
Forecast is to be mid 40s all day, pouring rain and snow showers.

Before I know it, it's 5 minutes until race time. For the first time ever in my life, I'm not excited to be at a race.
1 minute to start, and not one person is within 20 feet of the starting line, which is hilarious. At anything shorter than 50k, you'll find ninnies at the line 20 minutes before, doing sprints or stretches, fixing their shoes, and sizing up the competition by looking at their legs. I can't stand that. This is why I love Ultras. People are REAL.
After a few jokes from Andy about how noone wants to start, we're off.
It'll be a 6 mile climb to the top of the mountain, then a rolling descent of 4 miles back to the farm.

The course is soft from all the rain, and the field quickly thins out.
I couldn't find a free bathroom before the start, so I hit the Port-a-Potty at mile 5. Sperv and Annelieseare there, and have already tapped the Longtrail Keg. It's 6:45am.

Not much of the last mile to the top of the mountain is runnable, and there's a really cool section called the Labyrinth- a section of woods with really thick evergreens. You almost need a headlamp during the day there. After you break out of the Labyrinth, you're standing on top of the mountain with a great view of the Green mountains...but I don't waste any time admiring the view.
The descent is already super muddy. I run behind a couple veterans from NH who say the course is similar to the Muddy Moose, a ridiculously muddy 14 mile trail run in their home state. At any rate, it certainly doesn't make the descent any easier, as it's dangerous to go to fast, yet slippery if you try to hold yourself back.

Back at Amee farm, 10 miles is done. I treat the small crowd to a little "running man" dance, grab some food, and head back out on the course. I feel pretty good, but it is POURING.

At mile 15, Sperv and Anneliese are there helping serve the racers noodles and sandwiches, and coffee for me. Perfect.... I didn't have enough before the race. I run the last 5 miles of the lap, loving life with a nice little buzz. The buzz has a side effect, though, and I stop at the top of the mountain to pee. A racer walks by and says, "bad kharma to pee on top of the mountain!". Maybe I should've listened!

Mile 20, and the running man comes out again. Andy Asks if I'm going to do it after every lap. "Definitely", I yell.. but inside, I'm kinda feeling like junk.
On the course for my 3rd lap, the course is absolutely trashed. Most of the trail is barely runnable, with mud shin deep or worse. I'm not mentally strong today, and it's starting to really piss me off every time I lose my shoe or almost fall on my ass.

At mile 25, I eat some ramen noodles and cookies, and try to pump myself up mentally.
"How's it going to feel in Mexico?", I ask myself..It's a statement that usually makes me suck it up, but today it's just not there.
My legs don't even feel energized. Normally, around mile 25 is when I'm in a euphoric state. Around that time, endorphins are kicking in, but there's not enough fatigue to be mentally drained. Something's up.
I've been hacking stuff up the whole race, and my knee has a small twinge on the side from the relentless downhills.

I climb to the top of the mountain from mile 25, through the Labyrinth, chatting it up with a 200er. He's suprisingly alert for having run so many hours. I really want to do that race next year.

I come back to the farm, get a couple of burgers and sit by the fire. I'm cold and feeling like 100%, Grade A crap.
I don't want to tell Sperv, Anneliese, or Andy that I'm thinking about dropping. It's a humiliating, humbling, awful thing to have to say, but I say it anyways.
They convince me to go another lap, and I reluctantly set out. 10 minutes down the trail, and I know that its over, but I stick it out until 35. It proves to be a very motivating and educational last 5 miles.

I've all but given up, so I drastically slow my pace to mull things over why this day turned out the way it did. The 200 leader comes up behind me with his entourage, and he is on a different planet. A Lala land, if you will, of uncomfortable pain.

He's got 3 guys ahead of him, yelling to him the details of the trail and what he needs to do("run this part", "watch out for this root", etc.) One guy is behind him, hand on his lower back, making sure he doesn't fall over, and talking him up. Every so often, he complains about the mud, and you can hear the physical emotional stress in his voice.
He's at mile 175 and looking good. Badass.

At mile 35, I pull the plug, and spend the rest of the day drinking Long Trail, helping the racers, and watching storm after storm blast us with rain, hail, and snow. I had a great time being on the other end of things...getting food and gels for people.

CONCLUSION
File it under "unceremonious long workout".
I went in with not much expectation, at last minute, and unfortunately did not come out the way I wanted. I'm not mad or upset.
I just wasn't up to the challenge.
On a positive note, I am structurally sound, and raring to go now.

Those last five miles behind Ryan reminded me that I have a lot of work to do, for I will be in those same shoes in 6 months...out of it, mindlessly putting one foot in front of the other, and hoping to make it mile after mile.

Thanks for reading!
krp

gangsta rap and porcupines

2010-04-19T19:38:00.000-07:00

"Its funny how things change overnight when you're thinkin' right"-Xzibit

Say what you will, but there is no better motivating music to me than rap.

I'm talkin' hard core beats, awesome wordplay

Sure some of it's terrible and morally lacking, but it's life.
I can't identify with jackin cars, selling drugs, or shooting anyone, but I sure can identify with "comin up"...you know, workin hard. Trying to make money. Getting your name out there, and putting your nose to the grindstone to get what you want out of life.
Look past all the rhetoric and swears and you got music about the struggles we all face.

"You got two ears and one mouth. That means you got to listen twice as much as you talk"- Chamillionaire

Anyways, I figured it was time for an update.
I smartened up. I'm not going to the VT 100. The last thing I need is another bout of some random tendonitis.
I'll do one or two big solo-unsupported runs this summer when I feel ready.

Speaking of feeling. I feel good. Put in some good volume the last week or so.
Sarah G was nice enough to accompany on the bike portion of my all nighter on friday. We started a skunk count, but saw only one during our ride.

Around 12am I made my way via bike to my apartment and had the ultimate test: changing clothes to running gear and NOT laying down on my bed. Once I do that, it's over.

Had a nice run on the always-lit bike path. Saw one more skunk and a fox watched me from 10 yards away over by the UMPI field.

Today Joey B. and I hit the Heritage center for a trail run. Trails were dry and awesome. Did some adventure running on a dirt road intersecting the West MTB Trail and came upon a random run-down camp, which really was only the size of a big ice shack. It's funny, we both noticed how the top third of most of the trees on the trail to the camp had been stripped of bark.
As we approached the camp, we heard a rustling and a HUGE porcupine came around the side of the camp. Not sure of its plans, we ran like two little girls for a second, then turned around. It had gone to it's den under the camp.
I love training up here.

krp

Aliens and Obligations

2010-04-09T16:00:00.000-07:00

Ever seen Alien, when the little monster comes exploding out of Ripley's stomach?

Feels like thats going to happen, only out of my head.

Other than a crazy headache, I'm doing pretty well.

Tendonitis is all but gone. Gonna try and put a good ride and run in this weekend.

Not going to lie, during those few weeks where my training was dramatically reduced, I had legit questions about my commitment to the sport, and this one was the most prevalent:
"Is this worth the emotional peaks and valleys?"

I am SO HIGH when I am training well, but the lows are really, really terrible when things aren't going according to plan.

I continued to question myself for days and days, until I came to the realization that there can be no other way.

Its who I am.
I have a body and mind built for unending activity. I live for it. I don't just WANT to do this, I HAVE to, or else I am an evil, vile person.
I almost feel obligated. If I quit now, I am wasting what I was created for.

I will throw myself off a bridge before I live a mundane life of: wake up, go to work, come home, eat, go to bed, repeat. That works for some people.

I need more.
I need to feel alive, and that life comes from physical experiences that turn me inside out emotionally.

When I've cycled or swam or run ALL DAY(or more), I feel like I have used every second to its potential....and that makes me happy and satisfied with my life, and who I am as a person.

Bring me to life.

krp

Pro and Con VT100

2010-03-28T07:03:00.000-07:00

Ok.
I'm not back, but I'm semi-back.

I ran on friday night...it was only 25 minutes, but I'll take what I can get right now. Actually, I came back to the apartment and was so unfulfilled that I went out and walked for almost an hour. I guess, in Ultraland, even walking is training too. I'll accept it.
I'd be ignorant if I didn't assume I'd be walking a lot in Monterrey this November.

In retrospect, during the last month leading up to the injury, I fell into a trap I hadn't fallen into in a years. I went too hard, too soon, and took a 3 week hit in training because of it.

I'm not going to Vermont unless I can pull some crazy water workouts in the next couple of weeks.
REALLY want to do Vermont badly, so I need to be rational and not push things too soon out of the gate.
Place rationale up there with balance on the impossible shelf for me this year.
I have the mental wherewithal, but my 27 year old body is too young to handle what I WANT to do.
It could be a frustrating couple of years if I don't do things to a T.

Going back to VT 100, let me plead my case on why I can:
-50 mile Treadmill run, overnight, was 2 months ago to this day. Still have some umph from that run
-Lots of run mileage leading up to the:
-Death Race 3 weeks ago.. 10 hours overnight, mental and strength training for sure.
-All I need to do is a small build in volume over the next 4 weeks with one major long day(doesn't even have to be all running) 2 weeks prior.
There is a whopping 40 DAYS until the VT 100. Almost 6 weeks.

Now that I've talked myself into it, I'll see what Troy at Northern PT thinks.
6 weeks is a long time.

I crave the trail..
No, I don't just crave the trail.
I crave trail gluttony.
-crossed fingers-

krp

blah

2010-03-17T09:23:00.000-07:00

I ran into this last september....getting caught up in training for all the wrong reasons.

Sometimes, I'm so results -oriented that I lose my brain and either don't train right (ie too hard) or lose my motivation. I see what I have to do and its either fight or flight. Balance is proving to be very elusive this year.

I ask myself, now, in a bout of tendonitis, what happened to training for the love of training? Maybe this inflammation is a blessing in disguise, for I am missing training. My body needs it. I want to feel my heart pumping. I want to slip into that mental place where obligations don't exist...when I'm into a workout, I'm just in zen mode. My lack of zen mode is really killing my joy of life right now.

In the grand scheme, the Vermont 100 is a mere 6 weeks away. The April major ride is 3.5 weeks away. So, I need to start putting major volume in, which, until this injury's gone, means major pool time...and this means boredom to the point of jabbing my eyes with toothpicks.

Gotta find that balance.
To WANT to train.
To be confident in my training and ability.
To RELAX my mind.

7 months till 5x.

krp

wow

2010-03-11T18:03:00.000-08:00

I dunno.

I'm dealing with some tendonitis. My head hasn't been in the best of places lately.
Turns out I do have it in my blood to be a complete jerk to people, after all.

Just restrict my ability to train, and the asshole-ometer cranks up.
Sorry, friends. There's more to life than training, it just took me a day to realize it and get over myself.

I'm thinking of starting a new blog in addition to this one. Up until this "injury", which is actually just inflammation, the increased training time had been taking me down some different roads and memory lanes.

I'm always so busy looking forward, that I never really look back on some of the things of the past. There's some tragedy to that, as I feel like I'm forgetting about more things every day...maybe more even than the average person.

It feels like, for 27, I've lived a ton of lives and had some really crazy things happen...maybe it'll make a good story someday.

So, in regards to starting a new blog, I think maybe I'll spare you the same training-based blogs every time and spice it up with some experiences that have led me to this point.

This blog will be called Fuel.
They are the stories that made me who I am- the events that shaped me as a person. The stories will be raw and real, and will not be in chronological order...just written as they come to me.

Fuel. Coming very soon.

Krp

trail love

2010-02-24T16:56:00.000-08:00

I eat pain.
Marathons for breakfast
I go insane
Crossing races off my checklist

Muscles stay taught
But far from bulletproof
Injury battles are fought
While picking jerky from my tooth

I glide over green grass
And up the mountains high
Pulling wedgies out my ass
No matter who I'm running by

I'm a huge geek to running lore
Gimme rain, sun, and heavy snow too
As long as I'm stepping out the door
And not onto some doggie doo

I listen to that gangsta rap
While hurdling downed trees
Wearing my dry fit cap
Ignoring my bleeding knees

Roadrunner-like my legs twirl
Carry me over hill and dale
Not one to care for the real world,
Just get me on the trail

krp

switchin the steez

2010-02-22T14:13:00.000-08:00

It's February still, but I'm declaring that Spring has sprung. First road ride today.
And because of this declaration, I'm pretty much going to be knee deep in training until November.
In planning my next few months, I will have a steady progression, where my scheme is to be training for future training sessions. Training for training. Hmm.

Basically, I'm following the same formula as last year, with regard to swim bike and run. Major run mileage through spring. Major bike and swim in the summer and fall.

New developments:
-Thanks to a good friend, I have medical clearance for the Quintuple. Still have to get my blood samples, so they know I'm not doping.
-signed up for a 24 hour mt bike race in August. That should be a ton of fun, considering I'll be doing 40 hour rides prior to that.
-speaking of which, planning a significant bike ride april 11-12. Its going to be epic...and perfect training for the bigger yet ride in june.

Overall:
-Some IT band tightness.
-Running base is fantastic.
-overall fitness is awesome...it is definitely time to be upping the ante.

Mentally, I am rekindled with todays road ride. Never again will I let someone tell me "you can't bike here until may". I will be out on the bike every other day, now that I've done it seen that the roads are fine...tornado, snow, rain, or sun.
Its just great to have something new to do....a zero impact aerobic activity that I can do a zillion times longer than running.

I'm so fired up.
All I want to do is train.

krp

2010-02-19T07:08:00.000-08:00

I'm writing this on my crackberry, in an effort to supress the unbelievable boredom of an exercise bike.

I'd rather bundle up and ride outside. So, why am I here? Good question. Something about doing a ride then spending just as long cleaning my bike as I did riding it....

Interesting. I find it very difficult to type and maintain an even pedal stroke.

Ok, now the real stuff:
-race is officially in november. Saaaweeet.
-this is my first week back on the bike. I was nervous about the long hiatus, but it seems snowshoe running has kept my bike anatomy surprisingly fit....now I just need to build my "ass callouses"..or is it calli? Hmm.
-one more long workout. 2 shorter intense sessions, and then its marathon time. That really crept up. I feel goooood, except for a tight lower back. A massage and some hamstring stretches should alleviate that.

Mentally, I'm looking forward to the weekend. A party is happening, and I need a night out. I've spent entirely too much time inside my own head the last week. I can tell I need social time when I finish my training for the day and I feel kind of depressed.

All part of the game.

To the Hunt.

Krp

yup

2010-02-16T11:13:00.000-08:00

I had another "frustrated" spell last week.
Some people must read what i write and think i'm the ultimate brooder.

If i blog it, it doesn't show as much in the "real world". So no, I am not a brooder.

That frustration culminated in a pretty awesome night workout the other night.
I ran, on snowshoes, with a 25 pound pack, to Mars Hill from Presque Isle via the railroad bed...about a 15 mile jaunt.
The idea was to do an out and back for 30 miles, but it just wasn't happening.
The pack was too much.

It was cool while I was out there- every so often seeing the red lights of the windmills atop the mountain. They never looked closer, even as i was chewing up the miles between me and them.

It's always really creepy out there for the first hour or so....your eyes haven't adjusted...the railroad bed seems narrow, and the forest pushes ever close to you.
It's like running down a tunnel.
I ran most of the trail with my light off...and every once in a while a down tree would look like a moose or monster or person waiting to jump me.
Ran into a groomer on the snowmobile trail.
It's always weird to come into contact with humans after you've been a nocturnal animal for a few hours.

I guess my goal now is to train myself into the ground this week and next week, then chill out until the snowshoe race on 3/6 so i can go well rested. I'd like to think I could do well at the marathon...but we'll see. I've never raced long distance on snowshoes, so it will be a learning experience.

i am so ready for spring.
krp

i need this

2010-02-08T07:32:00.000-08:00

i dont wanna do this
don't wanna do that
there's a mile-long list
and it makes me feel flat

it holds me down longer
piling more on my shoulders
i will come out stronger
like momentum of rolling boulders

-/-/-/-/-/-/-

it's like a plastic bag over my face, the obligations.
i breathe harder to improve my situation
but it only makes things worse, and and me terse
i need to escape everything, get away from the curse
time to be severing, it's unsettling til i burst
a spaceship stews and simmers before the blast off
underneath my eyes glimmer, and i take the mask off
my thoughts go from scatter to clear cut
i'm going to train hard, no matter what

krp

puttin in work

2010-02-07T15:01:00.000-08:00

Had a great visit with Nicole this weekend.

Friday night, my phone buzzed.
On my Crackberry, that means one of 5 things.
It wasn't a phone call, and it wasn't a text.
My battery was not dying, nor was I receiving a Facebook message.

It was an email from Jorge, race director in Monterrey.
Apparently, there's a good possibility that, due to construction, the Quintuple is going to be moved from November to September.
We'll know his week.
Kinda adds a new element of stress.
Good stress, I think.
It forces me to get all of these little details out of the way...the ones I've been putting off forever.

Details such as... planning my Uber workouts for the rest of the year.
It's gonna be a pretty awesome summer.
Think solo ironmans, monster lake swims, and crazy bike rides that make my PI to Bangor ride look like charity rides.
No more treadmill runs...I'll tell you that right now.

While I don't look forward to the sleep deprivation, I think it's cool to be in it- feeling your body just come alive the second you start working out.
Mentally, I want to start blasting off these huge workouts.
Really though, it's too soon for all that.
I'm not interested in getting to July and hating my training because I'm stale.

Next on my radar is the Snowshoe Marathon in VT next month.
26.2 miles on snowshoe will be...interesting. It's much more difficult than regular running. It's more like lunges and ab work all at the same time. I'm excited.

The first what I call "major" workout will be a multi-day training camp at the end of March...where I will train at an undisclosed location for 4 days with no phone calls, no technology, no obligations, and no distractions. That should put the finishing touches on my VT 100 or 150 Mile Run preparation, and give me an additional boost to 5x fitness.
I guess at the end of the camp I'll decide whether I'll go with the 100 or 150 in May.
I feel like the training camp is one element I did not include in my training for the VA Triple last year, and that may have made the difference from injury to no injury.

I dunno what else. I'm feeling good.
The lifting is paying dividends in the pool.
My legs are sore from plyos last week, but it's a good sore.
Time to get some rest.
This is a big week of training.

krp

confessions

2010-02-02T18:50:00.000-08:00

Demons say
I'm only trash
Sometimes, its not ok
In my mental cache

I'm full of no's and can'ts
It's never good enough
Distance is my only chance
To keep my head above

Tiny remarks, the unsaids
The eyes and body language too
Sink my heart like lead
Until I fire it up as fuel

The question's always why
Why do you what you do
You know where my heart lies
Now, you have a clue

i cant eat enough "clean" food to supply my metabolism. an ode.

2010-02-01T14:19:00.000-08:00

Always hungry
I look at the menu
I want it all
To the kitchen I'll send you

Calories and clean food
Are not a mix
I can't eat enough
To get my fix

Seriously, its impossible
I need that grease
Nutrition's an obstacle
Maybe my only crease

So give me a burger,a pizza
Or some fries de la french
Before I lean like Piza
And fall on your wench

I'm losing it. Lol

Holla Back Young'n

2010-01-30T13:03:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm blogging a lot lately.
For me, that's a direct correlation to a training volume spike, and a social life dip.
Blogging helps my head.

I try not to talk about my training as much as possible, because of the responses I get("you're crazy", "but why", etc.) and..call me crazy, but I'm afraid of jinxing it all.
I don't want to get injured.
Now, I can understand why Eileen Steil goes to multiple pools to do her workouts...so people don't know what she's doing. She's right, it's just easier to not have to explain it.

I've started to become a superdork of the sport. I'm digesting all the greats blogs and analyzing and visualizing and really starting to go inside of myself. Every tough point in training gets easier when I ask myself how it's gonna be in Mexico.
Is it too early to be going into this mode?
If I was trying to win a single Ironman in October, maybe...But some of the best Ultra triathletes in the world do numerous Double and Triple Iron competitions before doing the Deca in november. I'll copy the europeans, who dominate the sport.

The harsh reality is that there's no room for error right now.
8 months is all I have, really, to build my endurance.
I'm gonna blink, and it's going to be June. Another blink, and it's October, when training hard ceases.

I do need to work on a creating a couple of training camps of 4-5 days away from everyone and everything within the next couple months for the big builds.
I have some ideas; I just need to work on scheduling the time off.

My brain continues to try and wrap itself around a 700+ mile race.
I wonder if I'll ever be able to justify a 700+ mile race in the same way I can now shake off a 50 mile run..... the human body is crazy.

2010-01-28T17:59:00.000-08:00

Guess its time for a 5x-specific update, to kind of place where things are at in relation to the race.

It's really easy for me to just get lost in the day to day of things. Writing it out fills you, the reader in, and helps me put things in perspective.

On my calendar, I have a new goal for each month. Last month, the big word was FOCUS, because I couldn't get into a routine.
February is DETAILS.
Gotta get to a doctor for a med check and hematocrit test.
Have to get my passport.
Gotta get my sponsors finalized so I can get there without living in a tent for the summer.
Have to finish my website.

I'm having difficulty finding time around training and work and other life obligations to get this stuff done.
I have a feeling I'm going to have to "disappear" this summer, just so I can adequately train.
No more obligations.

I feel good post-50. Only carnage is a couple blisters on my big toes and some thigh chafe. As miserable as that 50 was, it was one heck of a jump start to fitness. If I can get a 20-30 mile long run in per week now, my run will be on cruise control for the next couple months.

And now that the run is on the way, it's time to start developing my bike fitness. Won't start doing ridiculous rides until june or july. I have one special ride I'm planning this summer. Noone will know what or when it is till I'm halfway done. I think it might get too much hype if I talk about it to early...and then what happens if I don't finish??

I just submitted an email to Dick at the UMPI pool for a sponsored pool membership. Sad that the only reason I haven't been swimming is because I can't cough up the moola right now. I just don't dare, with all the other potential mexico related bills out there, if sponsors don't come through. I'm not worried, though, swimwise.
In all honesty, I can be ready to survive a long swim in a month and a half....however, I'd prefer to not "survive" in Mexico.

I'd kinda like to thrive.

The bottom line is this: I'll just take it day to day, and somewhere around June it'll all be on cruise control.

I can't wait for that.

Aftermath

2010-01-25T17:24:00.000-08:00

I'm laying in bed writing this.
Been in bed almost all day.

Wow, last night's Treadmill 50 miler was....an experience.

It was like a time warp. During the night, time dragged on like I've never seen. There were times I could swear half an hour had gone by, only to look down and be surprised that just 6 minutes had passed.

No scenery. No terrain change. Just me in the mirror. Joe and I talked very little throughout the night. We were both in our own little world of pain. I saw every infomercial known to man, and then back to back to back repeats of nesn's sportscenter. Awful.

Miles 20 to 45 were a slog. I just couldn't seem to get my head into it.Overall, my attitude was pretty negative, and I'm not sure why. At mile 45, I was so over it that I just went as fast as I possibly could without hurting myself, just to get it over with. I finished feeling more relieved to be done than proud of the accomplishment.

Never thought I'd get to a point where I'd consider 50 miles a "routine" run. I feel like I pushed my mental limits- due to the nature of treadmill running, but physically I feel fine. Sure, the usual ultra stiffness is there, but that's temporary.

The first ultra of the year is always a shock to my system. I think that's why I couldn't get my mental game down. So I'm glad to have the initial shock out of the way. On to bigger things...

krp

Sunday Night Fever

2010-01-23T06:34:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow's the big day....or should I say night.
I feel a little nervous.

Questions start to arise as I start to wrap my head around the night:
-I know my equilibrium will be affected, running stationary, but how bad will it get as extreme fatigue sets in?
-What will my pacing strategy be?
-How much of each type of food should I bring?

Running treadmill for 10 hours does have its perks, though.
You can watch your form and how it changes as you get more tired.
You can bring your "aides" (ie foam roller, etc) and just get off the treadmill and use them.
You can play with pacing and see how things feel.
No leaves for toilet paper....

As a whole, I'm excited to get on and see how things go.
Got a small group run tomorrow, then a couple xc ski lessons, then it's time to prepare for the run. Maybe a short 2 hour nap from 5-7pm.

Really hoping things going well.

+1 notch

2010-01-19T05:36:00.000-08:00

I'm steppin my game up.

-Bought my website domain and hosting.
Soon, www.kalepoland.com will be up and running...hopefully by the end of the week.
There, you'll be able to check out my sponsors, get race updates, and see where my training's at.
-Should have my $$ sponsorship letters out within a day or two.

My first real test of 2010 is sunday night.
50-60 miles on a treadmill. It'll be an overnight run at the PI Inn and Convention Center. 10 hours, from 9pm to 7am.
This is how I know I'm strange. I'm excited to run for 10 hours on a treadmill, at night, instead of sleep.
While I dread the boredom, I look forward to what it's going to do to me. It's going to dumb me down.
It's going to train my mind to not think.
I will become a zombie that just moves without thinking. It's the closest you can get to turning yourself into a robot. A machine.
I'm hoping I get through unscathed, and if I do, that'll be a HUGE jumpstart on my way to Mexico.

I was confessing to Troy my debauchery of the weekend yesterday, and how I always leave party weekends feeling guilty that I only trained my booze tolerance. He brought up a great point. Balance. Why, he asked, do you think you are always hearing about NFL and other pro athletes getting in trouble at bars and whatnot? You gotta let loose.
Thanks Troy for rationalizing my stupiditiy. There is some truth to this...I was very motivated when I woke up yesterday morning.

A light ski today will loosen me up from yesterday's 4 hour snowshoe run and 1 hour of plyometrics yesterday.

When training's going well, it's easy to love life.

ventilation system

2010-01-12T06:17:00.000-08:00

this is how i know i need to move to a professional level....
i think i'll basically go crazy if i don't.

i need things to be steady, and right now, my training feels bi-polar.
it's either awesome days, or no training at all.
it's like i'm living two lives.

in one, i work. i eat crappy food. i drink beer. i hang out.
in another, i train. i eat clean food. i'm motivated. i jump out of bed to train.

thing is, i hate the first. hate it.
it's the same zombie life i had with olympia.

i'm sick of the winter, already, because i can't bike.
not even enjoying skiing this year....a first.
so over it being dark 75% of the day.

i know a lot of my recent blogs have sounded angry.
in a way, i guess i am.
i want to train. it's all i want.

i've finally reached this point... where the amount of time i have available to train does not give me what i feel is enough. it's too early in the year to forego sleep.
i'll crash in may if i start that now.
maybe it's a chance i have to take to preserve my sanity.

this wasn't that coherent.
my brain is scattered. now you know why.

update 1-9-10

2010-01-09T12:44:00.000-08:00

Did a 2 hour Snowshoe run last night, gaiterless. How dumb is that?
Frostbite on both achilles tendons.
Yehaw.

Other than that, I felt awesome. I gotta say, I feel very very strong right now.
When all is said and done, I'll have about 15 hours of training in this week, which is solid for this time of year.

Joe and I are planning on running a treadmill 50 miler on the 25th, so hopefully that bodes well for both of us. It will be mindnumbing, but that's exactly what I want. I don't want to think. I'd like to turn myself into a robot that just goes, and I think that's a solid way to "program" myself.

On the snowshoe run last night, I felt worked, but in a good way. I could feel my core engaging- something that has not happened before. I've always been extremely weak in the midsection, and I give all the credit to Troy at Northern PT and Kate Hanes.

Gotta bite the bullet and get on the bike already. That's the missing element to my training right now. I'm not as concerned with the swim right this second, although that's going to have to happen here real soon as well. Running is going well...lots of mileage and time on my feet this year already.

I'd considered the Beast Of Burden 100 in february. I don't trust myself to be honest. I don't want to go there and get injured. More likely will be the McNaughton 100 in May in VT. They have a 150 mile option that I'm really considering. It'd be nice to go to Mexico having run 150 miles before. To have that confidence at the starting line of the quintuple would be pretty awesome.

Hard to believe in a few months sleep deprivation comes back into play.
Feels like just the other day I was showing up at physical therapy in the morning, not having slept yet, feeling like crap, and just trying to get through the day. I have to admit that I don't look forward to that, but it is a necessary evil.

I am raring to go....a stark change from 2 weeks ago.
I have been reborn.
Let's get it on.

Itching The Hermit

2010-01-06T06:39:00.000-08:00

I'm getting to that agitated point of things.

This week was supposed to be my first spike in training volume...but I somehow got the plague of a lifetime. The good news is that now, it's on the downslide. I feel better after 10 hours of sleep last night and a Nyquil overdose.

When I plan for something and it doesn't happen, I get this little itch inside, and it keeps getting worse until the matter is resolved. This little itch is usually a precursor to what I've now come to call Hermit Mode...
No friends. No phone calls. No personality. Just training.
Usually it's a week or two weeks, culminating in one huge workout....IE Presque Isle to Bangor ride, run to Houlton, etc.

So I'll have my first big workout next week.
I'm tossing around a few ideas in my head, but the reality is that I won't know exactly what it is until the day before. It all depends on how this next week goes.

Right now, I'm just thankful that I am relatively structurally healthy. My name was just posted on the Mexico site for the Quintuple, so now it's more real than ever. I'm going, and I cannot wait. Just have to be smart and not overdo it.

Man, November's gonna come quick. It's scary to think I only have 10 major workouts left.

Zoinks. See you next week!

krp

Ramble

2010-01-01T12:56:00.000-08:00

Wow.
Haven't updated in awhile.

I guess, really, there's not much to update.
Just spent the last month working every day all day...
I sure am glad to have that behind me now.

2009 was one psycho year. Like, crazy.
2006-2008, I wrote Year In Review blogs. I just read them, trying to get inspired to write something on here, and there is one common theme in all of those entries: they ended with something to the effect of: "insane year". This leads me to believe that life in general is crazy, my life is crazy, or more likely, I am crazy.
The best part is that each insane year just keeps adding new chapters to the book I've been trying to write for the last few years. I collected some really great material this year. I know that at some point, I will do it. Absolutely. It's just a matter of when.

Soooo. 2010.
There' s a lot on my plate right now.
I just submitted my entry form to Jorge for the Mexico Quintuple Iron. That's November 14.
Eileen Steil really put it in perspective on the phone the other night. Really, I only have 10 months of training left.
10 months to get ready for 703 miles of racing.
I have a ton of other races in the plans, but if I don't make it to them because I don't wanna get injured, or have to drop during them to better prepare for Mexico, that's just going to have to happen.

So, I'll be in the gym, battling for machine use at the gym with all the "1 monthers". That's a title I give to the resolution people. January is always so crazy at the gym...where do they go the rest of the year?

I dunno.
I'm ready to focus now. My wild oats have been sewn since that cold October morning.
I've lived it up quite a bit. Drank my beer. Eaten my junk food.
My goals for 2010 are simply stated:
-Keep a balance of social life and training. It can be hard to pull myself out of training mode when I'm in the zone.
-Keep it fun. If it ain't fun, I'll burn out.

Here's to the new happenings....

Triple Trouble

2009-12-01T06:22:00.001-08:00

It's 6 am on a Sunday morning and I'm a mess.

I smell terrible.
Snot runs down my nose and onto my lips and I don't even care.
I'm crying and sobbing uncontrollably as I peg-leg in 2 mile increments.
My right leg stopped working 6 hours ago.

The mummy bag wrapped around my body keeps me warm in the unseasonably cold 43 degree Virginia morning. I look like a crippled Snapple fruit.
A crippled, frustrated, angry, disappointed... Snapple Fruit.

I "walk" past a camera crew and pull the mummy bag over my face. I can't even look at the photographer, but I can feel his eyes on me. Must be thinking "That poor bastard".

I've never felt so low, and there's no way someone's going to capture this moment.
Hard to believe that, up until 6 hours ago, I was clicking miles off almost effortlessly after no sleep for 40 hours.

Welcome to Ultra Distance Triathlon.
A handful of people in the world.
Number of races in the world: count them on your hands, and MAYBE take one shoe off.
They range from Double Iron to Deca Iron distance, although a select number of people(literally a couple) have done 20 Irons at one go.

This one's the Virginia Triple Iron.
7.2 Mile Swim, 336 mile bike, 78.6 Mile Run
46 hours ago, 20 of us lined up on a beach posted with a sign that said "no swimming".
Ironic.

We plunge into the water, but noone's in a hurry.
No point rushing when you're doing a 60 hour event.
The water is fairly calm, but that doesn't last long. As the morning wears on, boat traffic on Lake Anna picks up. Worse, the wind picks up.
Next thing we know, we're swimming through white caps....
The .4 mile swim course is a loop that parallels the beach, and the waves are so bad that you can only breathe on the beach side, or risk lungfuls of water. I remember thinking..If this is any bearing on the rest of the event, it's going to be a long weekend.

4 hours into the swim, I'm scraping sand with my hands...what the heck?!
The waves have started moving the buoys toward shore.
Common sense says the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, which means I can safely say I'm swimming much longer than 7.2 miles while goose-chasing buoys.
On the bike later that day, veterans would tell me that it was the roughest swim they'd ever had at Lake Anna. Ocean-esque.

Exiting the water in a longer-than-anticipated 5 and a half hours, I'm a little dizzy, which is normal, given the length of time in near-weightlessness and rough water.
I make my way to the row of tents that I would come to call Tent City. Each athlete gets a tent to store their gear and food. It's basically a base camp of sorts.
We would pass these shelters a million times on the loop courses of bike and run, and at each pass, we would receive food and drink from our crew.

After a couple timing chip issues(mine wouldn't work) that cost a little over a half hour, I'm on the bike. I didn't anticipate the feeling of holding myself up on the bike after swimming for so long. I feel so weak. My legs are toast. How am I going to stay upright and pedal for 24 hours or more? Self doubt is already creeping in. Time for an attitude adjustment.
I have a strategy for these times...
Whenever I feel less than positive, I eat everything.
Fruit. Comfort food. Sweets. Coffee. Evvvvverything.
Sarah, Sperv, and the parents did an awesome job....almost too awesome. I would leave Tent City sometimes with not enough hands to hold the food. Jeez, each lap only takes 20 minutes! I didn't need all that! Great job!

The Friday afternoon flies by, and soon night is falling. My body is starting to come around after 5 hours on the bike and eating everything.
I am positive again.
I always have this feeling of contentment when night comes. You just come to this realization that you're going to be out here alllll night. Might as well settle in and just get into the zone, and start clicking off miles.
Dad and Justin strap on the light, and I'm gone.

The night blurs together in my memory.
Some hours were hard. Some hours were easy.
Some laps you had to change batteries or lights.
I got to this point where I could tell who was coming at me just by the lights on their bike.

3am hits, and most of the veterans are asking if I've slept yet.
I take that as a cue to hit the tent for an hour and a half, even though I don't feel especially tired. The idea, apparently, is to hit the hay before the sun comes up. The Double Iron athletes(which are to start this morning) would begin arriving and making a raucous.

I hit the tent at 3:30, get an amazing massage from Sarah for a few minutes, then lay in the tent, awake, for the next hour and a half.
In the dark, I "watch" little circular mouths with teeth all around them and tongues sticking out swirl in a kaleidoscope pattern on the ceiling of the tent.
I'd heard about hallucinations, but had never had them until tonight.
I can't help but watch with a strange fascination, being conscious enough to know what they are, but just alert enough to wonder if I should be worried. These would be the only ones for the entire race.

The zzzzzzziiiiiiiipppppppp of the tent at 5 AM comes way too soon.
Justin pops his head in.."Time to get going".

I ask for 10 more minutes... as if 10 more minutes is really going to make me feel better after I've been racing for 20 hours. My body already feels trashed.

By this time, my parents have arrived.

I pull myself out of the tent, and everyone's staring at me. My eyes are blood red and barely open. I'm stiff and tired. I know how bad I look because noone's saying anything. Awful is not the word to describe how I feel. It's easily 100 times worse than I felt before I laid down.

To top it off, I am feeling sorry for myself because I know that I just blew my only chance to get sleep- probably for the rest of the event.
Justin is the crew leader for a reason. He realizes the shit is hitting the fan and basically forces me back on the bike. It's 5AM, give or take.

I spend the next 2 and half hours riding in the dark(figuratively and literally) in absolute misery...planning ways to quit, and eating everything in sight. I know the pending sunrise will lift my spirits. It's a lesson I learned from my Presque Isle to Bangor ride one night...but it seems as though the sun will not come up. These hours are the longest hours of my life.

At 9AM, I'm back in what I've come to call Kale's Manic Mode. I'm always a little too happy when I workout. This is no different today, with Sperv and Sarah screaming like crazy on every lap. They also have Manic Mode of cheering.. I mean who else can cheer for 40 hours straight? Crazy.

By this time, we have our system for fueling down, and there are no stops, just fluid (pun intended) transfers. My ass did not leave the saddle from 5am to 5 PM Saturday, when I finished the bike ride. At one point around 12 or 1PM, the officials miscount my laps.

I'm like 280 miles in, and it's the last thing I need to hear. I am so pissed off that I put my head down and start ripping off laps. I know it isn't rational while I'm doing it, but I am so beside myself with anger that it is the only way to vent. My fastest laps of the bike ride are from miles 280 to 336.

I get a quick shower after the ride, and change into my running clothes, and it's back to work.

By the time I down a couple cheeseburgers and blast 6 or 8 miles out, the sun is setting. The calmness I was talking about earlier comes over me and it's time to settle in and start plowing through some miles. My parents surprise me with Dominoes pizza. I grab 2 slices, stack them one on top of the other and eat them on the go. Best pizza ever. Thanks, Dominoes.

The 2 mile out and back is pretty much uphill on the way out and downhill on the way back. The temperature is dropping hard into the 40s...a stark contrast to Friday's high 80s. People are bundled up, but man, it feels normal to me. Feels good. The miles are blazing by. I'm high on coffee, food, and the spirit of the race. Tent City is lit up and it's awesome to come back in for a morale boost every 20 minutes or so.

I hit the marathon mark, and I feel better than I have the entire race. Meanwhile, the carnage is starting to show for some. I pull up to one guy who's staggering. He's drooling on himself, and proceeds to tell me that he has 14 pairs of shoes....and I never asked him anything. I say hi to almost everyone I pass, but few return the greeting. Maybe it's because I've said hi to them every 20 minutes for the last 40 hours. I bet they hate me. Haha. Manic Mode, bitches.

A few miles later, I feel mentally fresh, but I am starting to stiffen a little bit. A mixture of the cold and sheer volume of the race is taking its toll on my legs. I always do butt kicks to loosen up during ultramarathons, so I do a few. After running a little bit, I realize something's not right. My right quadricep is so tight. What's going on? I half run, half walk back to Tent City and sit down. Sarah and Sperv feed me. Justin can tell I'm thinking hard. "What's up?"

"My quad's messed up."

He makes me walk a lap and goes with me. Maybe it'll loosen up....right? Wrong.

Eileen Steil happens to be crewing for Michael Gaertner, a past Deca Iron winner, in the shelter next to mine. She's a massage therapist and one of the only American ladies to finish the Deca. She comes over and has me get on her table. She tapes me up and we go walking up the road for a lap.

I can barely even walk now. It hurts to pick my foot up off the ground. It hurts to even move my leg a centimeter. It's decision time. The doctor looks at it. Probably a strain...and probably shouldn't keep going and turn it into a tear. It's early morning on Sunday...like 1am. I decide to hit the sack and wake up in a few hours to make a coherent decision.

When I wake up the sun is rising. I keep my sleeping bag on, don't say anything to anyone and start walking. Justin comes along.

A mile in, and I know it's over. I have an angel on one shoulder telling me I did well just to go this far. I have a demon on the other telling me I have to now go home and tell people I couldn't make it. I couldn't even look at the timers when I handed them my chip because I knew I would lose it.

I found it very difficult to cope with the abrupt end of my race. I never expected it that way. Before the race, I figured that if I was going to DNF, it would be because of outright fatigue.

So much learned. I now know what to expect. I know what I need to work on. Some would let a DNF ruin them. Some would dwell on it.

I'll dwell on it, alright. I'll let it simmer and motivate me all winter long.

Here's to Progression.

To the Hunt.

krp

Quintuple Your Pleasure, Quintuple Your Fun

2009-11-20T09:26:00.001-08:00

I realized I haven't updated in a couple weeks.

This is the time of year that weird stuff just materializes.
You think you've got your schedule planned out, and then something new hits you right in the teeth.

My recovery is fine. I'd say I'm 90 percent. I need to get flexible to make it to 100%.
I'm pretty tight still.

You may have read the sidebar, but let me fill you in.
I was content on going back to Virginia for the Triple, but then I get an email from Pete(deca dude, as I have come to call him in the blog):
"Wanna race Monterrey next year?"

Ummm....YES.
So I do some thinking and scheming.
I bounce the idea off Eileen Steil, one of the only American ladies to ever finish the Deca.
We come to the conclusion that I'm too young for the Deca...but not for the Quin.

I'll be 27 next year. Still a solid 10 years off of peak.
There's a chance, if I am smart, that I can really do ok at this Ultra triathlon thing.
Who knows.

Some new developments:
-Sponsors are coming in slowly. Rocky Mountain has given me a great deal and terms on a bike frame, as well as some pretty amazing clothing.
-now going to Northern Physical Therapy 5 days a week to work out and do injury prevention.
-Beginning to work with a nutritionist so that I can get everything I need to out of my diet.

I guess things are coming together pretty early, which is a good sign.
This morning I had a moment of hesitation....is it too early to be "in the zone"?
Then I remembered one of my favorite quotes of all time:
"There is no such thing as burnout...just loss of appetite."
Wish I could remember who said that.

I don't think there's a worry for loss of appetite.
There are a few goals that I won't be posting on here that are keeping me quite hungry.
Big things.

Never in a million years when I started this triathlon thing did think I would be even considering races like these.
I feel very blessed to be supported by so many amazing people.
The caliber of people around me is top notch, and I could never be doing what I am doing now without the circle of friends that I have.
Thank You.

krp

Win Win

2009-11-06T19:26:00.000-08:00

Lots of exciting things going on this week.

Got two good runs in this week.
The first 40 minute run was interesting. Felt rusty and lots of weird kinks.
Tonight's 45 minute run was amazing. Effortless.
I need to share this.
The world of pain I went into during the triple has upped the ante. I can't explain it, but I felt so different out there tonight.
A new confidence or something. The pain threshold has been raised. I want to test it so badly, but I know its too early for that.

Bob, the store's Rocky Mountain rep is checking into getting me a new bike frame. Carbon. Sexy. This is long overdue...my bikes pushing 10 years old!

So ready to dive back in.

It feels so good to be back.

kp

Holding Down the Human Torch

2009-10-30T06:28:00.000-07:00

I'm going nuts.

There's this void that needs to be filled.
While I have recommitted to training, that training is not even close to fulfilling the needs of my addictive personality.
1 Hour walks just don't cut it.
3x per week at PT for 2 hours doesn't do it for me, either.

Something's gotta tire me out.
Something's gotta get me outside of myself.

I'm turning to the wrong things right now. Gross food. Beer like crazy.
In short, I'm being a slob.
Real, mind-clearing training- the thing that ties my life together- is not there.

I thought I'd be past this mental point..pushing on 3 weeks out from the Triple.
Truth is, my frustration is starting to get worse every day.

I want it so bad and I can't have it.
It's like there's this fire just waiting for the right amount oxygen to turn into a full-blown explosion.

Maybe, this is exactly what I need to take things to the next level.
It's tattooed on my skin.

"Don't waste the fire."

I will not be held down.

Cause and Effect

2009-10-28T06:37:00.000-07:00

Took a walk last night. 45 mins.
Kept a cadence of 80-90 on stationary bike for 12 minutes this morning.

I'd say I'm on the comeback trail.
I know that recovery is not linear, so I expect a setback or two over the next few weeks.

Life is good, for the most part.

In setting up my race schedule for the next 2 years, I've come to the realization that I need sponsors, or take the pauper lifestyle to the next level.
I hate asking for money from people. Hate it.
I feel like me asking for money to go race is like someone asking for sponsorship to go to the bar on the weekends. How is it different? Both are recreational activities.

I think I need a cause.

There are times when I think what I do is very selfish. These events are all about me, and I so hate that idea. I've been given the mental and physical ability to do super-distance races.. I should be doing it for good reason.

If I had a cause, I wouldn't feel bad asking for money, and I would be helping a little bit too.

I sure am rambling.

Anyhow, I have the Triple on tap for next year as my "A" Priority race.
However, my grand focus will be the DecaIron in 2011. Only a handful of Americans (under 10) have finished. In case you're wondering, that's 10 Ironmans in 10 days.
Hopefully, I can take what I've learned over the course of this year and apply to injury prevention for the next couple of years and have some good training.

kp

IT LIVES!

2009-10-21T06:34:00.000-07:00

"So Kale, what have you been up to since your drop from the VA Triple?"

Umm.
Let's just say my booze tolerance is going up.
Let's just say my social life is through the roof.

I've been really making an effort to keep myself busy.

The first few nights back in Presque Isle, I came home from work and just sat there, thinking.
Thinking is no good. You think yourself into a deep dark hole.

Remember in Talledega Nights when Ricky Bobby quits Nascar, and in the bar his old assistant gives him this pep talk?

"It's because it's what you love, Ricky. It is who you were born to be. And here you sit, thinking. Well, Ricky Bobby is not a thinker. Ricky Bobby is a driver. He is a doer. And that's what you need to do. You don't need to think. You need to drive."

I can draw a parallel to this Ricky Bobby quote.
When I lived in Waynesboro, I got all messed up in the head. Thinking. Alone all the time.
Too much introspection is like holding a mirror in front of a mirror and trying to figure out which reflection is the good one.

My mantra since that time has been..."All I know is Go."
Apply it to life. Apply it to whatever.
Just keep going. Screw everything else. No one can take away your will to keep going.
It's yours.

So I'm starting to Go again.

10 minutes on the bike this morning is a start. Northern Physical Therapy...I cannot say enough for what they've done for me.

I've been given the OK to start swimming a little.

Some who know me are worried as they read this. "It's too soon".
It's not. I'm moving. I'm not going hard. This is the time of year to just chill and have fun.
Nothing serious.

I feel like the Frankenstein that has been put back together. My movement will be slow and ugly at first, but that's cool. Ugly is cool.

I'm alive. And it feels great.

kp

Body Snatchers

2009-09-30T05:40:00.000-07:00

Oooh, I forgot about this part.
The taper.

Every twinge creates a panic:
"Is it an injury? Am I going to feel this next week?"

Difference is, I'm mature enough now to think rationally.
I used to stress out big time.
My body feels great overall.
I'm getting more sleep than I have been for the last 6 months.
I just need to stretch. I've been telling myself all along- if I'm going to DNF, it'll be because of a flexibility issue. With that in mind, the next week is going to be crazy full of looong stretch sessions morning, noon, and night.

The other part to this taper thing is the continuation of an addiction.
It's a well-known fact that people who spend a significant amount of time training for a race can fall into a depression after the event.
The way you build your life around it and sacrifice so many things for it...when it's gone, you feel empty.
I've never really felt that before, mostly because I am always looking ahead anyways.
So to talk of continuing the addiction...I'm already looking at next year.

I'm not going to make declarative statements, because whenever I do that, things don't happen.

There are certain events I am eyeing.
I want to go longer. I want to go faster. I want to move without thinking...and my body to repair itself on less sleep than ever before. I want doctors to be baffled and insurance companies to be weary of covering me. I don't want to be human.

Bring it.

14 days. A Brief.

2009-09-25T05:27:00.000-07:00

I've been going about the last couple of weeks all wrong.

The thought process has been...."I HAVE TO do this, HAVE to do that."
As a result, training during september has been stressful and unenjoyable.

Somewhere along the line, I forgot to have fun. I was so wrapped up in the consequences of not training that I lost sight of why I do these things.

I'm glad I got my head in the right place in time. If I had carried that attitude into Lake Anna, I would have forgot to have fun during the race, and that would have surely ended in a DNF.

Got to remember that I love the scenery, the relaxed feeling I get after working out, and the time alone to sort out my thoughts.
It'll be here before I know it.

In 14 days to this moment, I will be doing my second Ironman swim.
In 15 days to this moment, I will be glad to see sunlight after riding my bike all night.
In 16 days to this moment, I will hopefully still be upright, plowing through miles of running with only one thing in mind...a finish line.

I think I'm going to play this one song by Nonpoint the entire time in VA...
Still Alive and Kickin'....

kp

t minus 14

2009-09-24T05:20:00.000-07:00

Mixed emotions today.

Today I feel:
Very Nervous.
Stoked.
Stressed.
Excited.
Paranoid.

2 weeks.
My sleep deprivation is pretty much done.
I felt so awful yesterday that I canned it and was in bed by 10:30 last night.
With the hours of work I need to put in the next 2 weeks at Mojo, the chances of actually getting my required rest from now until race day are slim. It's times like these that I wish I was a professional athlete.

On tuesday night I did a 4 hour ride until 2 am, and I had such a strange range of thoughts...
"How do you possibly think you can do this race?"
I'm 26. There's a reason no dude under 31 has finished this.
Then minutes later...
"48 hours is doable!"

No expectations is what I need, but it's in my nature to think I am going to go there and kill it...even if in the back of my head, I know the fitness isn't there.
Well, the fitness is there. The mental might be there.
But I can NOT get caught up in the idea of going fast during the race...especially on the bike.
I'd like to actually be able to RUN a little bit on the run.

I would expect my blog rate to go up during these next 2 weeks. My brain will be racing, and my training volume will be less. I will need some type of outlet.

The hay is in the barn.
And I am preparing my mind to go into some really, really bad places.
14 days.

kp

super cheesy rhymezzzz

2009-09-21T19:01:00.000-07:00

I'm focusing up
And numbing down
I bike all night
Through every town

I inhale food
And exhale pain
New aches start
As old ones wane

I'm building my resume
As an enduro geek
My brain is dead
But my body's sleek!

So what do I do
When I reach my triple mecca?
I go right past the finish
And aim for the deca!

Captain Crunch -19 days

2009-09-20T13:39:00.000-07:00

19 days till race day.
5 days of "no effing around" training is about to start.

It's the last chance to callous my brain (and body...but more importantly, brain) before the 2 week rest period from September 25-October 9th. Starting tomorrow and ending friday, my only concern is burying myself in training and sleep deprivation.
I'm going to wake up in the morning and wish I hadn't gone to bed because the sleep was just a tease.
I'm going to pop caffeine pills and ibuprofen like M and Ms.
I want to make myself cry like an overtired little girl when the alarm goes off on friday morning.

For further motivation, I'd like to hear sometime before this race through the grapevine that someone doubts me. Or thinks I'm stupid for doing this.
That will help quite a bit.

On the fun side of things...
-Starting to buy food and other items for the race. Kind of adds some excitement. This is really going to happen.
-Troy and the Crew at Northern Physical Therapy has made a cycling jersey and triathlon jersey with their logo on it so I can represent their awesome facility. I really wouldn't have been able to get this far without their help. They know what they are doing!
-Getting the crew on the same page so they know what to expect. Luckily, I have Justin, an athlete, and Sarah, a massage therapist on the crew. My college friend Sterlynn will also be there. She'll be doing twitter updates and making food and stuff.

Race weekend visualizing has begun.
Swim. Stay relaxed.
Bike. Eat and stay focused on not going too hard.
Run. Just grit the teeth and get it done.

Troy and I have been discussing sleep during the race. To sleep or not to sleep?
How foggy will I be and how stiff will I be when I wake up?

I guess time will tell.

2009-09-14T07:06:00.000-07:00

25 days.
There's a frustrating point in training for a big event where you know you're fit enough to do it, so you wanna do it before an injury or something happens.truth is, I feel fit enough, but there's no way to know really.
While I MIGHT be fit enough, there's certainly some fine tuning over the next 11 days.
I can swim hard for the next 18 days for sure.
I got a long run walk to do tonight after good day of training today, and that'll be the last major weight-bearing long workout.
Then next monday it's another long ride- 15 hours hopefully. And then the long hours are done.
It's almost time. The days are really flying by now.

4 Weeks Of Crabby Hermit Syndrome

2009-09-11T05:59:00.000-07:00

Exactly 4 weeks to this very moment, I will be 3 hours into a 7.2 mile swim...hopefully daydreaming along and patient. Triathlon swims are the worst when all you can think about is getting done. I hope that I can find that peaceful rhythm and just settle in, so that I am not starting the race off on the wrong foot.

I think my plan will be to swim 3 laps, or 1.2 miles, at a time, then stop for fuel for a minute, and get right back to it. That'll be 6 segments....much easier in my head than thinking 18 laps.

There are other factors in my life right now that are adding some unnecessary stress.
My car. Moving. The "divorce". Money.
They try to take my focus off what I've been training for all year. I cannot let this happen.
Usually the day before or day of a race, I kind of go into myself.
I don't enjoy talking to people. I get agitated really quickly.
I guess it's my way of focusing up.

Strangely, I am already starting to feel this way, 4 weeks out.
I'm not thinking about socializing.
I'm thinking of the core work, the stretching, the workouts, and the details I need to be focusing on over the next month.
The race is consuming my existence, and all I want do right now is go into hiding and just prepare for the next month.
Is this healthy? I don't know, and I guess I don't really care.

I think it's good that I'm hungry.
I am still pretty fatigued from the overnight bike ride to Bangor and the lack of sleep earlier this week. The goal is to be really well rested come Monday and Tuesday, where I'll do back to back long training days.
After those two days are done, there's one major bike ride left and then the hard work is done.

Here's to not trapping yourself in a limited world.
Limits are only for the closed minded.

kp

crank

2009-09-07T10:26:00.000-07:00

When I laid down to go to sleep last night, I had been up for 45 hours straight... a new high for me and an even larger accomplishment given the bike ride the night before.
I struggled to keep my eyes open for a few hours prior to that, but that might have had something to do with the Octoberfest.

Ever seen that movie Crank with Jason Statham?
I felt like him yesterday.
As long as I stay amped in a sleep deprived state, I'm good to go.
It's when I'm just chilling that sleep tries to yank my eyelids down.
For the first time in my training, I feel like I know what to expect in a month.
The aches feel like injuries in the wee hours of the morning, but ibuprofen and sunshine seems to cure everything.
Another sleepless night on tap for tonight. No training though- just driving.

I sometimes wonder if I am taking the right path, living this lifestyle..but then I get smart.
If anything, training for this event has enriched my life.
You haven't lived until you've seen Katahdin in the moonlight on a clear night after 80 miles of riding.
I'm thankful for the experiences I've had and the people I've met, and I look forward to all the new things in the future.
It's in my blood, and I could never go back now.
32 days!

KP

Math For Zombies (40 days)

2009-08-30T06:43:00.000-07:00

40 days = 5 weeks, 5 days.
5 weeks, 5 days = 3 weeks, 5 days of hard, hard training.

I can't even pretend to think that I'm not getting more nervous by the day.

Mike, Von, and I did a nasty, nasty ride yesterday.
It was supposed to be a century, but even though no one said it, I think we all knew that at 25 miles, we weren't going to go all the way.
The windchill had to be around 40 and rain...ideal hypothermia conditions.
We bailed at 85...which sounds lame considering we really only had another hour left, but the headwinds were relentless and we were freezing.
The course was extremely hilly, and I feel good about where my legs are at.
Today I feel as though I could do the whole thing again.
I did have a humbling/sobering moment at mile 80 yesterday when I reminded myself that in a month, I need to another 256 miles on top of that.
Apples and oranges, though.
Hilly course, fairly intense yesterday.
October = relaxed pace as possible, flat course.

Barring major tragedy, I think I'll be ready for the swim. I have a fairly aggressive buildup plan over the next few weeks. I don't have to dog-sit anymore, so that opens up major time.

Bike wise, I still have a couple things that need to happen. TT bike or road bike? I need to do a long ride or two on the Cervelo to figure things out. If I can't be comfortable on it, it's going to have to be road bike.

On the "run" side of things, I need to do one more all-nighter and pretty much walk/run everywhere I go from here on out.

Will I be ready?
The answer lies not in my body, but in my head.
If I can achieve enough balance leading up to the race to want it when things start to get ugly.
If I can stay there mentally during the race to eat right.
If I can be patient enough to pace myself in the early hours of the bike.
Right now, I want it. And as time goes on, I think I'm only going to want it more.

kp

47 Days

2009-08-23T06:37:00.000-07:00

Had a great conversation with Pete yesterday about sleep deprivation and training.

We talked about caffeine, pain management, etc...but what I really brought away from the conversation is the fact that in order to finish this, I am going to have to be an anomoly of sorts.

I believe the quote was this:
"Every kid I see come to Lake Anna is a DNF. Unless there are bones sticking out somewhere, you have got to keep moving."
Apparently, the younger guys like me just don't have the mental goods yet to get through that 2nd night. It makes me nervous.
Why has no male under 31 ever finished this event?
Am I missing something? Why do I think I can?

I compare it to getting my first tattoo.
I think, "How awesome to do it...but how much is it going to hurt?"
So many unknowns.

So much going through my head right now.
Am I training right or enough?
Pete seems to think I'm doing well with my sleep deprivation training, but that for the most part has been easy. Am I doing it wrong or something?

I need a confidence booster bike ride before I do this, or I will stand on the start line unsure of myself.
Pete has said that he doesn't do any mega-rides, but as an indivdual, I feel like a I NEED to get a solid 20 hour bike ride in.
Just so I know what it feels like.
Just so I'm not questioning my ablities.
If it's all in your head, I need that extra edge.

"Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside them was superior to circumstance."-Bruce Barton

47 Days.

Perspective

2009-08-13T07:26:00.001-07:00

57 days.
Let's think about how stupid this is:

Peaks To Portland, a difficult endurance swim in southern Maine is 2.4 miles.
I have to do this distance 3 times with no rest.

The Trek Across Maine is 180 miles in 3 days.
I am supposed to do almost TWO of those in one day. 6 days of riding in around 24 hours.

A marathon is the pinnacle of some runner's endurance achievements.
I need to run 3 of them consecutively after doing 2 Trek Across Maines, consecutively, and 3 Peaks to Portland swims.

Kind of hard to wrap my head around it, really.

NO SLEEP TILL BROOKLYN!
Oh, wait...NO
SLEEP
TILL
LAKE ANNA!

Doesn't really flow...but you get the point.

kp

60 days

2009-08-09T05:58:00.000-07:00

46 days until "The Hay is in the Barn", as my old track coach Bruce Bell would say.
At that point, you can no longer do anything to make you more fit, and rest is the only thing necessary.

Most high-intensity events call for a full-month taper of training.
This low-intensity event is doable on 2 weeks of rest.

My life is getting turned upside down right now, but training is a great tool of relief.
Not really sure what to do with my car, the dog, or my apartment, but at least I can still ride a bike. Blech.

This comes at a great time in my training, really.
My rage at earth in general makes physical pain easy, and there is certainly no shortage of motivation to get me out the door.
My only focus for the next two months is surviving a Triple Ironman.

Rode a nice 120 mile bike ride last monday, and it was relatively easy on the body.
I still need more "ass training", or new shorts. My ass was chizzapped after that ride.
A double century(200 mi) is next. Not sure when, but very soon. I just need to get rested.

Within the last week, the 336 mile bike ride has turned from something I fear to something I think is doable. The 120 mile ride was very, very hilly, and the amount of work done on that would probably be akin to at least 150 miles on the flat Triple Iron course.

Gotta start putting long kick sessions in the pool. I'm not worried about my upper body on the swim, Troy at Northern PT has me doing some wild stuff.
Maybe two more overnight walk/runs.
3 more uber-bike rides.

And then...the hay is in the barn.
I'm just ready for the harvest.

kp

Think Negative. 68 days

2009-08-01T12:11:00.001-07:00

I'm stiff.

This is my last week of easy training for the next month or so, and today is the last day of this week. Looking back at some of the things I've written in this blog, this is usually about the time I start to make these declarative statements... things I'm going to do or my times for the race.
It jinxes me, and they never get done.

This time, I am going to do the opposite, and write about everything that is wrong.
Perhaps it will further help me put a grasp on what I need to do between now and October 9.

1)My swimming is in the shitter.
When Leah comes back, I can spend less time walking the dog and more time swimming.

2)My butt is not hardened enough yet.
Long rides are on the way though....

3)Not enough all nighters.
At least that doesn't require extra time...it actually creates time to train...hmm. Two birds, one stone...

I gotta say, if that's all I have for negatives, I am fairly satisfied.

My whole race hinges on the 336 mile bike ride. I am not afraid to admit how much it scares me.

So much can happen. How will it affect my back and neck, being hunched over for over 24 hours? What about my ability to walk or run after? At first glance, one looks at the flat course and thinks AWESOME...but then, if you think about it, flat only means that you have to constantly pedal. No coasting. No climbing to change up the muscle groups.
I'm experimenting with a couple different bikes to see what will be the best compromise of comfort and performance.

I think about the bike a lot, and think some more, and then realize I'm ignoring my lifetime mantra...

"Don't think, just do."

kp

You Win! (73 days)

2009-07-28T12:29:00.000-07:00

Congratulations Kale R P,
You are the winner of a 3 night stay in Turner, ME!
Thanks to your purchase of a shatty 1999 Land Rover that over-heats, you get one extra night in paradise.
Great.

As if I didn't have enough on my plate, now I have to figure out how I'm going to get to Presque Isle, how I'm going to get my vehicle fixed, and how I'm going to come back down to get it.

So...I'll escape this situation by sitting here and blogging.
If I ignore it, it'll just go away... right?
With the most exciting Tour de France I have ever seen, my blogging took a back seat in July.
Sorry.

One cool thing- we ran to Houlton last monday from UMPI- a 45-50 mile affair.
It was so hot, and the railroad bed is so open that shade is hard to come by.
It was a long day, but a great day until the end. Not going into that though.
The point is that Joe did unbelievably well in his first ultra situation, and though I would never call running that far easy, it was the easiest Ultra I have ever done. No mental issues, just blisters.

EVALUATION
Right now, I feel good, but I am done riding and running intensely.
A group ride spoils the rest of my weekend training.
Riding for 2 hours red-lined is going to do nothing for me after 20 hours on the bike.
I need some good back to back long days on the bike.
I need pool time.
I need flexibility time.
Leah's return from camp mid-August directly coincides with what I am going to call...
"No Effing Around" Training- a month-long, wisely planned out cram of all the last chance training I will need.
Long rides, long swims, and long run/walks, and plenty of sleepiness.

I told Pete(Deca Dude) in an email today that I was starting to get nervous, to which he replied,
"You should be nervous. You are about to do the longest triathlon in the US."

So anxious.
kp

no grammar

2009-07-14T14:53:00.000-07:00

if you haven't figured it out, i'm a quote guy.

i heard this quote once:
"there is no such thing as burnout,
just loss of appetite".

i also heard that over-training
leads to burnout.

i think it's all attitude.

right now, i'm a mess.
my eyelids droop, and my shoulders slump, and i want to lay down and sleep for 3 days.

i don't look at it like..."i need to slow down".
i look at it and say..."damn dude, you better harden up".

when i'm training and the pain sets in, my new mantra is "what's it going to feel like in virginia?"
it puts it all in perspective, and my head shuts up.
interesting, yea?

picked up the Coffee News the other day, saw another old quote:
"shoot for the moon,
so even if you fall short
you'll still be among stars."

i thought that was kind of funny, because
in my early triathlon days, i wanted to be a pro triathlete, just for the glamour of it.
now, here i am, rubbing elbows with some of the
world's most prominent (or should i say only) ultra distance triathletes
and if i finish, i'm all of a sudden one of them.
the best part?
we're too crazy to attract professional funding.
the sport is still super obscure.

i'm not doing this for the fame of it anyways.
frankly, i cringe when people
i didn't tell ask me about it.
pretty much the whole town knows now,
so i guess it's extra motivation to finish.

87 days.

89 Days

2009-07-12T04:56:00.000-07:00

Just wrapping up a fantastic 7 day block of training, and other than a little tired, I feel great.
I put in about 30 hours over the last week..lemme break it down:
10 hours of running/walking
6 hours of PT/plyometrics/resistance
14 hours of biking

Notice the lack of swim in there.
I am having a real challenge finding swim time.
Open water swimming solo is dangerous, and pool time directly collides with PT and work. I'm going to have to work something out here..

The good news is that I'm beginning to feel really awesome on the bike. I can really feel the difference from the plyos I'm doing. Less slouch, better muscle recruitment, fantastic.

8 days until the run to Houlton via trail, a 40 mile affair. This week will be a rest week until sunday night, and then it's right back into some heavy duty sleep deprivation and major volume. It'll be interesting to see how this Houlton run goes on minimal sleep with a good bike ride prior to it. It's Joe's first Ultra type workout, and he's amped. I'll be depending on his enthusiasm to get me through. Although I have never done anything like this, I am hoping the training I've done up until now will make it "easy", i.e., no major mental crisis. Either way, it's going to be a really cool day.

Chronic Fatigue and Ratings (94 days)

2009-07-07T09:22:00.000-07:00

I am tirrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeddddddddddd.
I'm sure it's spillover from saturday's long bike day and sunday night's long hike/run.
Mix that in with the lack of sunshine, and I am feeling very dreary and unphotosynthesized.

I know it's not a word, but while we may not benefit nutritionally from sun, lack of it sure can have negative effects on us.

Ever since Pete and I chatted, I've been very gung ho. I want to train at the level of those ultra endurance veterans, but my body just doesn't have that huge base yet.
26 is simply too young, and my price for trying is chronic fatigue.

How can I counteract this? Extra sleep would be my first suggestion, but sleep is the enemy right now.
I need to know what mass amounts of aerobic activity on very little rest feels like. Not only that- my body needs to learn how to repair itself on what it gets for rest.

It's going to have to be diet. It wouldn't hurt to cut out group rides, 5ks, and other intensity workouts. It takes too long to recover and eats into my energy for the rest of the week.

RATINGS ON MY PREPARATION 1-10...(1 is bad)
-Swim- 3
Very little swim prep under my belt. I will begin with 2 hour swims in the pool and work up over the next few months in open water as well. I have not been very proactive because 1) the swim comes to you rather quickly with little wear on the body and 2) the swim is only, at worst, 1/12 of the event. I am not underestimating it.
4 to 5 hours is a long time to have your face in the water, and will take a serious toll on my legs if I'm not prepared.

-Bike-5
I have plenty of intensity miles on my bike..but intensity does nothing over 336 miles. The goal from here on out is ridiculously easy mileage and long hours in the saddle.. Culminating in a mid-august ride from Lubec to Kittery in one sitting...either until I hit Kittery or I bonk really, really, really hard.
You know what scares me the absolute most about the Triple? The bike. That's a long time on the saddle.
I know what to expect: the sore neck, the sore hands, the sore butt, and how it feels like your tires are flat when you're pedaling..and how you go to switch into your easiest gear and realize that you are already in it...
The course will be all flat, which means no coasting, which...you guessed it, means full-time pedaling.
No fear, dude. Riiight.

-Run-8
I feel as though I am right where I need to be for every sport, including logging all my hardest and heaviest mileage for running early in the year with plenty of time to recover in the last couple of months..My legs felt great the other night. The real test for my running legs will be my long bike ride in the wee hours of the morning of July 20 before me and Joe Mortland's 40 mile run to Houlton.

-Sleep deprivation-4
This might scare me just as much as the bike ride, because it's all new and completely unknown.
How will my body react to two nights without sufficient sleep and 3 days worth of continuous aerobic activity?

CONCLUSION
I'm coming to a point where I just want race day so that I can stop focusing on unknowns. I'm getting more nervous and anxious with each passing day.
My natural reaction is to go out and figure these unknowns out, but I can't just jump into multi-day bike rides.
I'm doing well at following a natural progression; something I've struggled with in the past.
I'm being patient, and listening to my body. If I can keep it up, I will stay injury free until October, and if I can stay injury free, I can finish.

Kill the Man, Become the Monster

2009-07-03T05:02:00.000-07:00

I remember the summer after high school.
I worked at FedEx loading trucks from 3-9 in the morning, did landscaping all day, and then worked at a restaurant at night.
A good night was 4 hours of sleep.
Although insane, I held a certain amount of pride in being able to do such a thing...and I was rich that summer.
If only I knew where that money went..but I digress.

I bring up the summer of 2001 because I am set to go on a whole new level of sleep deprivation.
Many of you know I've been seeking advice from Pete Lefferts, the only American Deca-Iron athlete at the World Championships last year.
Yes, 10 Ironmans. Yes, all in one go.
Yes, swimming 24 miles, biking 1120, and running 262.
Get your head around that.
He's telling me I need to do about a week at a time with no sleep, except for 45 minute naps here and there.
Anybody can gut 1 night out on the course, but he says, it's the second night, running through the night after already biking all night the night before that's the tough part.

The crew becomes essential on the second night and during the third day, because the athlete has turned into a robot and can no longer really think for themselves. The crew needs to know what the athlete needs just by looking at him.

In talking with Pete yesterday, I am more fired up than I ever have been about an event. It kind of reminds me of training for my first half ironman. The fear; the not knowing what to expect or how it's all going to unravel.
People keep asking me why I'm doing it.
It's the training. It's the challenge. I need to know if I can do it.
If I can, a whole new realm of my life will be opened.

Race Across America, Ultraman, Great Divide Race, Self Transcendence, Swimming the English Channel, Eco Challenge, Primal Quest, Le Tour Ultime.
Google any of these, and you will find they are some of the hardest races in the world.

People keep telling me that what I am doing is awesome, and I am only humbled because what I have done thus far, in the words of Ricky Bobby, "isn't worth a picture of a whale and a dolphin getting it on".
I haven't accomplished anything yet. Lots of people run 50 miles.
Some do 100, some do 200.
Yiannis Kouros has run 1000 miles in 10 days.
A Triple Ironman is an accomplishment that only a handful of people in the world can say they've done.
Am I too young?
I guess we'll find out.

kp

If and When

2009-07-02T03:05:00.000-07:00

I'm done watching the news.
Everything is so gloom and doom about war and financial crisis.
I'm just tired of hearing about it every hour....every second even.

You know, if things are going to happen, let's get it over with already.
If every state is going to go bankrupt, let's go, so we can start over again.
If North Korea is going to bomb us, get it done, so we can retaliate and wipe them out.

I get so tired of hearing about what's coming, or how this or that is on the verge of happening.
It's all speculation.

Honestly, why bring it up if it might not even happen?

I might die tomorrow.
I might die in a minute.
It might be possible for the world to explode at any given second.

Thing is, we can speculate and analyze everything, but the one truth is that nothing is 100% predictable.
Chance. Isn't it a beautiful thing?

It forces us to live in the moment in a world where everyone is trying to figure out what's going to happen next.

I'm reminded of a tee shirt I saw last summer that had me laughing for a while.
Haikus are awesome,
Sometimes they don't make much sense
Refrigerator

Life is that random. So let it go, media. Report on what's happened, not what's going to.

T-Minus 105 Days!

2009-06-26T03:51:00.000-07:00

I'm tired this morning.
Was it the dog waking me up at 4:30, or the big thunderstorm we had last night?
Or, was it the time trial last night?
Hmm, I would indeed say... yes to all.

It's been a few years since I last did a straight up, all-out bike effort.
Double that up with the plyometrics I've been doing with Troy 3 times a week over at Northern Physical Therapy and whoa, what a shock to the system!
In reference to Mondays horror show of a bike ride, Troy figured that it just hasn't been long enough since the 50 to jump into those long workouts- which, he's right. It hasn't even been 3 weeks yet. Most people take about a month of recovery, but I took no time at all, thinking it would be cool because I was structurally fine.

Anyways, my energy is beginning to return. I've been eating everything in sight for the last few days, hoping to replenish anything I might be missing. In order to load up with calories. protein, and nutrients in the easiest way possible, I've started with Cytomax Recovery in addition to my regular diet..

I guess most importantly, I'm ready to recommit to Ultra Long training after this week is over. I'm guessing my bike ride in VA is going to be around 24 hours, and I have got to start building up to rides that long over the next 2 months.

Questions I need to answer for myself through training these next couple of months:
-Time trial frame or road frame with aero bars?
-Bring an extra, larger pair of shoes(bike and run) for swelling feet?
-What is the max number of calories I can absorb per hour without getting sick, and what mix of solids and fluids?
-How often do I need to switch from electrolyte replacement to water and back?
-How much fuel can I take in during the 4 hour swim without cramping?
-What is the least sleep I can go on? Most of the seasoned ultra-endurance dudes will not sleep. I will need to figure out whether I can do that at my experience level or not.

Oh there's so much more, but these are my major concerns, because they are directly related to finishing.
I can deal with chafing, blisters, and superficial things. I cannot deal with not finishing. They'll peel me off the course before I quit.

That's all for now.
Happy Training!
Kale

Abyss

2009-06-23T08:32:00.000-07:00

Man, am I in deep.
I feel like something is very wrong with me.
This is where this blog is going to help me in my pursuit to finish the Triple.
I need to write to sort out my thoughts, so I'm sorry if this particular entry seems like I'm talking to myself.

I have no energy. None.
I had plans to do a long ride up to St Agatha and back yesterday.
Made it to New Sweden when I realized that the ride was not going to happen.
I literally want to sleep, and had all I could do to get back to Presque Isle, where I laid down in my bed and slept for 4 hours.

I know whats up...I haven't been doing the things I need to be doing...
Sleeping..I only average 7 hours a night.
Eating well...I am having a hard time getting the calories I need every day to maintain the volume of training.
My body is essentially harvesting itself. I'm starving, in short.
It's affecting my attitude. I feel lethargic and depressed.

I've never counted calories, but I guess it's time to do that.
As I pedaled home yesterday, each stroke hurting me deeply, I had second thoughts.
Can I survive the triple?
Right now, I can't.

I guess the positive thing is that I realize today, 3 months away, that I need to get more professional about this event. Having the will to do the training means nothing if you can't supply that training with the fuel necessary to complete it.

I'm up against some very real factors here. Age, experience, and base.
Everyone in this event has years of experience in Ultradistance racing, and are in their mid-thirties and older.
While an athlete might be able to fake a 50 miler by training haphazardly, no one can fake a 421 Mile event.

Some thoughts I'm having during this "down phase":
I'm sure I can swim 7.2 miles, but how will pedaling a bike feel after that, moreover, for over 24 hours?
At what point is the event going to "get real", aka, when do the first round of mental crises come?

I never get these thoughts most of the time, and this is how I know something is not right.
Perhaps I should have taken a little more rest after the North Face Challenge.

Escape

2009-06-17T18:23:00.000-07:00

I'm not a part of this world,
Say my feet to my brain

And the rest of my body agrees.

For when I run,
I'm only in contact with the world
When my feet touch down

But they repel from Earth, and fly behind me,
bracing.
for the next dose of gravity

already craving the next air phase.

Race Report: North Face Challenge 50 Mile Run

2009-06-16T14:01:00.000-07:00

It's 2AM, and it sounds as though a train is about to run over me in my borrowed Wal-Mart tent.
No, there's not a loud snorer in the campsite next to me.
There's literally a train just over the hill from my Ozark Trail shelter. Great spot...

I manage to get another 50 minutes of sleep in before my cell phone alarm wakes me up at 3.
Time to eat a bagel, gather my stuff, and get going. I've woken up early enough to get some calories in and find some coffee along the way to Camp Lutherwood- the venue for the North Face Challenge.

Driving into downtown Bellingham, WA, I'm mildly depressed to see that nothing is open. Nothing.
Going without coffee before a 10 hour+ event is simply not an option for me, but it might have to happen this day.
U-Turn, and it's a 10 minute drive to Lutherwood.
Upon arrival, I'm relieved to see that there's an array of food and COFFEE waiting for the racers.
I have just enough time to down a cup, eat another bagel and peanut butter, and pin my number on before it's 5AM and time to roll.

One of my favorite parts about Ultra-marathons is the start. No one sprints off the line. A wheelchair patient would beat most Ultra runners in the first half mile of the race. It's funny because you see all these super-fit people going in slow motion...I guess it's just not what you'd expect.

We run by the lake and up by the camps where all 90 of us funnel into a single-track, densely wooded trail. At this point, the trail is so tight and steep that it is pretty much a hike until we hit the fire road.

The pack starts to thin out as everyone begins to settle into their own pace. I pull up next to an older guy from Juno, Alaska. We run together for twenty minutes or so, talking about our hometowns, dogs, and bears. A first timer, he pulls ahead of me and I never see him again. Impressive.

After a steep mile and a half hike up the fire road, we hit the first aid station. I eat some crackers and drink some water, but waste no time. It's too early for slacking.
20 minutes later, we're ascending Chuckanut Mountain. And it is STEEP. Three of us hike and pant our way up the mountain, which would be a day hike for most. We know there's still some 40+ miles to go after this, so we do what we can to make light of the situation, talking about random things.

At the top, there's no real celebration or acknowledgment of the end of the climb, but the descent is long, open, and amazing. I get maybe a little carried away and let it fly for a while, clicking fast miles off...until I see two dudes peeing in the bushes. I'm reminded that I hadn't pissed yet....and suddenly, I REALLY have to go. My pee is still clear...so we're good on the hydration front.

The descent ends as we reenter a nasty section of single-track along the ridge of the Chuckanut trails. It starts with short, steep climbs and scrambles(on all fours), and ends with quad-busting, mentally draining technical descents. At one point, I look to my left and realize that I'm on the edge of a cliff with a vertical drop I don't care to estimate or think about.
It's at this point that I realize that I'm doing something I never would have thought about 5 years ago.
17 miles in, and my quads are already wrecked.
We come out of the woods, and all of a sudden, we're on fire roads again. It's a fast four miles to the next aid station, and it feels so easy to run when you aren't scrambling over things or holding yourself up with a tree to prevent you from sliding down a cliff on your butt.

I stay at the halfway aid station for a few minutes, taking stock of myself and downing bananas, chips, and drinks while a volunteer fills my Camelbak. I am a little tired, but my mind is fresh. My electrolytes are good, for once.

I pry myself off the pavement and start running down the fire road, raring to go. My levity quickly changes as I round the corner and stare at a wall. At least it's not technical, I think to myself, and start hiking.
Half an hour later, I round a turn and I'm still hiking. Half an hour after that, I get back on the trail, round the turn, and I'm still hiking. At this point, I'm pretty frustrated. Honestly, how long can a hill be?? Only after the race do I find out that the "hill" was actually Blanchard Mountain.
The hills level off, and I am running on the ridge of Blanchard, trying to keep my spirits up. That bitching mountain sapped a lot of my energy. I had gels and bars in my Camelbak, but I couldn't stomach another one of those. Finally, I get to an aid station and down potato chips like a pro. I take the whole bowl for myself and just chow down. I know I need it because of how amazing it tastes.

I leave the aid station and this time it's a climb in the middle of the woods. Not even a trail. There's an orange marker every fifty yards, and that's the trail. I'm pissed, which I know is bad, but I can't change it. I'm tired of climbing and tired of lifting my legs to get over boulders and downed trees the size cars.

The descent begins, and each step kills my feet. My muscles are sore already. It's a double-edged sword in that it hurts my muscles to hold myself back on the downhills, but letting it fly kills my feet, which hurt as well. I bitch and moan all the way to the aid station at mile 42.

My attitude improves immediately upon seeing human beings after having run alone for hours. I chill out for a good 8 minutes at mile 42, trying to sway my spirits to the better side of things for a last push to the finish. The volunteers, who aren't runners, tell me that the last 8 miles is all downhill. I trudge off feeling as though these last few miles will be an easy celebration of the day.

2 miles later, I'm staring at something I cannot comprehend. Gnarly roots. Massive rocks.
The Oyster Dome, called "Kill Bill Hill" by the locals, is a vertical monster that I can't even explain. Although I want to cry, I can only laugh at the situation.
There is no place for despair when you are out there. No one can really help you. You have to put one foot in front of the other and just deal with your own little crises as they come.

There are day hikers on the trail at this point, and they clear the way for us as we literally stagger up the mountain. You can see the sympathy in some of their eyes...for they are struggling up it, and know that after already going 45 miles, it must really suck.
I feel no thrill as I pass 4 racers on this section. We're grabbing trees to pull our bodies up and are forced to stop every couple of minutes to catch our breath and keep our wits about us.

I get to the top and try to get myself together, as I'm pretty messed up in the head after the climb. I descend the last 5 miles- a mix of painful single track and fire road. I'm so traumatized by all the climbing that I honestly expect a climb after every turn, even though I know these last few miles are downhill.

Finally, I run by the camps we ran by earlier in the day. I come out of the woods, and there's the finish line.
I'm beat up, but mentally good to go at the end... even faking a fall right after the finish line, to the laughter of the people I had run with throughout the day, and the concern of the medical people who didn't know I was joking.

So I was able to keep my electrolytes in balance, which has been a challenge for me in the past. I do need to improve my eating though, and discipline myself to eat even when I don't want to. Gels and bars are better than zero calories. That was my downfall in this race. I really feel as though I'm learning a lot with each Ultra I do. I certainly am proud of the finish, even though it took a lot longer than I hoped. I had never run anything that severe, so mentally I kept it together and that's all that matters for October.

Thanks for reading...
KP

Update, 6/14

2009-06-15T04:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I certainly thought I would do better at updating this.
I guess when you make a commitment to do something that demands all of your focus and energy, the last thing you need is another thing to work on. I enjoy writing, I just haven't had the time!

The short story is that I am on track for where I need to be at this time. At 4 months away, the Triple is getting more real than ever. I really only have 3 months of quality training left.

Finished the North Face Endurance Challenge 50 Mile Run last weekend. There'll be a Race Report soon. It was a tough day, but I felt fine at the end, and I have no injuries from the race. That is the most important thing.

So, what's the plan now? Next month, me and one other guy from town are planning a run from Presque Isle to Houlton on the snowmobile trails. It'll be a nice flat 35 mile run. I am toying with the idea of the Great Cranberry Island 50 Mile Run two days prior to that, but it's still a little early to tell if I'll be ready. That's July.

In August, I will attempt to do the entire Maine Coast from Lubec to Kittery on a bike in one continuous ride.
After that, it's just maintenance in september, and that's about it.

Kale

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night

2009-04-26T05:43:00.000-07:00

It looks like it's going to be another amazing day in Presque Isle.
When training is going well, everything in my life seems that much better.

I took off at 10PM friday night for a little night ride, and ended up putting in almost 50 miles, riding From PI to Fort Fairfield. Fort Fairfield to Limestone, then to Caribou and back to Presque Isle. The average was a little over 16 MPH, which was good considering some of those sustained climbs and the hill workout I did with Von the day before.

That speed is sufficient for a Triple...and may or may not be doable on a flat course for a full day. Actually, in doing the calculations, at 16 MPH, that would land a 21 Hour Bike Split. I would gladly take that. I honestly don't know what to expect when it starts getting ugly out there...which my guess will be somewhere around 15 hours into the bike.

Night training is strange sometimes. You feel really in tune to the world.
Everything is quiet, and it feels natural after the first hour or so.
It amazes me that there's this world that goes on while we sleep, and it's exciting to see it in person. The deer in the fields, the random foxes and skunks. The people driving.
Where are they going at this hour? Are they drunk or just starting their "day" on the night shift?
At any rate, it's a cool feeling to ride directly down the middle of the road of a well-lit ghost town in the middle if the night.

kp

Take That

2009-04-24T16:08:00.000-07:00

World, you're suffocating me.
No more obligations
Stop with the bills
Enough petty nonsense
Stop spinning, I'd like to dismount

You're making me Earth-sick
Seems the only way to stick it to you
is to do what they say I can't
I'm going longer
to make you look smaller.
I lace up my shoes
....
and you shrink